


and the truth shall set you free

by wasthatreallyme



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Art, Chess, Dialogue Heavy, Dubious Consent, F/F, Fluff, Journalism, Lena Luthor Finds Out Kara Danvers is Supergirl, Lena Luthor Needs a Hug, Mutual Pining, POV Kara Danvers, Red Kryptonite Kara Danvers, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:48:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 39,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24898702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wasthatreallyme/pseuds/wasthatreallyme
Summary: Set after 2x02.  Kara is a principled investigative journalist writing an explosive story about L-Corp.  Lena is a sensitive billionaire who wants to get to know her.  But despite their obvious chemistry, Kara keeps turning Lena down to keep things professional.How do they get together?  An unexpected weekend at the Four Seasons, then Red Kryptonite, of course.This is a slow burn that is T until almost the end, but rating as E because of how it will play out.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 241
Kudos: 781





	1. Chapter 1

“Ms. Luthor, your six o’clock is here - Kara Danvers from CatCo.” Jess let Kara into Lena’s office and closed the door.

“Kara Danvers!” Lena exclaimed, putting her laptop to the side and standing up at her desk. She elegantly extended a hand. “Glad to see you.”

To Kara, Lena looked every bit the part of the successful executive, her dark hair pulled into a chignon, a black asymmetric dress exposing the creamy skin of her neck and left shoulder.

Kara felt too informal in her white button-down shirt, skinny brown belt, and navy pants, her hair up in a messy bun. Not to mention that, lit from behind by the setting sun, Lena was radiant. It was as though she was surrounded by a heavenly aura, like a painting of a Renaissance saint.

_Breathe, Kara. You can do this!_

“Hi Ms. Luthor!” Kara crossed the floor of the stylish, minimalist space that was bigger than her entire apartment. “Has your Friday been so bad that you’re glad to see a journalist?” 

She shook Lena’s hand and they both sat down. 

“Please call me Lena,” Lena said amicably. “Yes… not just Friday, it’s been a very long week.”

_And I’m about to make it longer._

Kara was working her first investigative story, probing a clinical trial L-Corp appeared to be conducting without proper approvals. She had been surprised that Lena had agreed to meet with her at all.

“So,” Lena leaned back in her chair, “I haven’t seen you since your cousin cleared me of the Venture sabotage. And now look at you - you’re a full-fledged reporter. Congratulations.”

“Thank you!” Kara said cheerfully. “And thank you for agreeing to see me on such short notice. Jess had made it sound like you weren’t going to be available for a month, so I was surprised when she called back!”

“Well, you were so delightful throughout all that nonsense, how could I not?” Lena was warm.

“You are too kind, Ms. Luthor.” 

_And have no idea what is about to hit you._

Kara dug through her bag, pulled out a notebook, and set her recorder on the desk. “Do you try to flatter all of your interviewers?” she added, cheekily.

Lena cocked her head to the side, amused. “No… just calling it how I see it. And it’s Lena, please, I insist.”

“Ok, _Lena_ ,” Kara emphasized, a touch sarcastically.

Lena bit her lip and smiled as she realized Kara was teasing her. “Ok, _Kara_... shall we get started?”

“Yes. I just have a few questions and I will be out of your hair.” Kara switched on her recorder. “So... L-Corp appears to be changing its strategy towards investing in riskier new technologies. Can you say more about that?” 

Kara had practiced saying her questions in the mirror that morning, hoping to sound like a seasoned journalist.

Lena’s smile grew wider and she leaned forward in her chair. “Ok. No softballs. I respect that, Kara.” She collected her thoughts, then responded. “I don’t think it’s fair to characterize the new technologies we research and develop as ‘riskier.’ We seek to be on the cutting edge of innovation, and that means that we fail a lot more than we succeed, so there is always risk. But when we do succeed, we can make major strides. For example,” she pulled out a folder with some marketing collateral, “we have a next-generation composite material we have just started to produce that will enable the next generation of spacecraft.”

As Lena spoke, Kara got lost in her thoughts.

_She’s running a Fortune 20 company at twenty-four._

_And seems so polished._

_And her eyes are so green._

_Wait, where did that come from?_

_Did she stop talking?_

Lena had indeed stopped. “Kara? Do you want to hear more about the partnership? I believe you’re already invited to the press conference in a couple weeks but happy to give you a preview.” Her eyes twinkled.

“Oh sorry. Um, I… that sounds like a very interesting program!” Kara fumbled. She looked down at her notebook and spun her pen around her fingers. _Breathe. Ask the next question_. “But actually, as an illustration of taking risks, I came here to ask you... about L-Corp’s development of artificial neurons.” 

Lena’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “How did you...”

Kara found her footing. “My sources tell me that you have started a first-in-human clinical trial, but the study hasn't been cleared by the FDA. There are financial records that would indicate this has been going on for about three months.”

Lena opened her mouth to speak, then shut it. “I...” she said slowly, “I... may have underestimated you, Kara.” 

“Do you confirm or deny the existence of the program?” Kara asked, meeting Lena’s gaze directly.

Lena straightened her shoulders, her chin up like a shield. “Kara, I am afraid I cannot comment on that.”

“It‘s fairly clear from the paper trail.” As the words left her mouth, Kara was surprised at her own assertiveness. 

“I have no comment, Kara.” Lena stared her down.

Kara knew it was risky but kept pressing. “Your critics might ask, to what degree has L-Corp’s culture of pursuing innovation, some might say at all costs, led to disregarding patient safety?” 

Lena arched an eyebrow, piqued. She took a breath and said firmly, “Can you turn off the recorder, please?” 

Kara shut it off with a click.

“Off the record,” Lena said, her lips in a thin line, “this was work a biotech had been doing when we acquired them. The program had not been disclosed during diligence but we saw its promise once we learned about it. Now we are cleaning house. I fired the people who were responsible for starting without approval, and we retroactively filed with the FDA. L-Corp would never jeopardize patient safety and I don’t appreciate the insinuation.”

“Aren’t the trials still ongoing?”

“Yes, they are. The FDA granted us an exception to continue.”

Kara’s sources hadn’t mentioned that the trials were actually approved. She wasn’t sure what this meant. “Well, then it sounds like you are doing all the right things. Why keep this off the record?” 

“We are a month into our rebranding. You remember - we need a fresh start after Lex.” Lena softened, her eyes pleading. “Kara, I am concerned if you report on this, it will look like L-Corp was hiding something, and we will lose whatever goodwill we have gained with the public and the markets. And, there may be pressure on the FDA for allowing an exception, and in the worst case, we would have to end the trial. The technology is very unique; the therapeutics we could develop could help cure Alzheimer’s and Huntington’s or other degenerative diseases we are powerless to stop today.”

It was a solid argument, but Kara knew she could not promise anything. “I hear that, Ms. Luthor! But, this story is going to come out one way or another. This is an opportunity to get your side out there.”

Lena deliberated for a moment, but didn’t bite. “You really can call me Lena. And I will consider it. But... I’ve had quite the day, and I can’t put together a coherent comment right now. And to be perfectly honest,” she winked, smiling ruefully at Kara, “I wasn’t expecting to get grilled by a novice reporter from CatCo in my last meeting of the week.”

Kara blushed.

“Anyway...” Lena stood up, the interview clearly over, “this is the first night in two months that I don’t have to work or go to some event. I would love to get out of here. Would you mind cutting this short and going for a drink instead? Off the record still, of course.”

————

Lena texted her driver, who pulled up minutes later to L-Corp’s private entrance in a silver Rolls Royce that smelled like jasmine. Kara had never felt such supple leather, let alone sat on it. 

“What do you like to drink, Kara?” Lena asked as they got situated.

Worried she would seem low-brow, but determined to be honest, Kara said, “I’m good with a beer!”

“I can work with that.” Lena winked as she turned to her driver. “Frank, how about taking us to the Whiskey Library?”

_Did she just wink at me again?_

“Don’t worry.” Lena turned back towards Kara. “They have a great selection of beer as well as whiskey.”

“I wasn’t worrying!” 

Lena said apologetically that she had to send a few emails. She turned her attention to her phone as Frank whisked them away. Kara stared out the window trying to work out why she was there. If this was Lena’s first night off in ages, why would she want to spend it with someone she barely knew? Was this a consolation prize because she had killed the interview? Was she trying to get on Kara’s good side because she now knew a story was coming?

When they arrived at the Whiskey Library, they were seated immediately in a corner booth, the maitre d’ practically falling over himself to help them despite the long line. Kara had never been there before, and was impressed by the concept; there were tall shelves of rare bottles lining the room, like precious amber displayed in a museum, and a bar with what looked like at least 50 taps. The wait staff appeared instantly whenever they so much as glanced at the menu, which had fancy cocktails and some whiskeys that were over $100 a glass. Being Lena Luthor certainly had its perks.

Kara picked a beer, feeling a little out of place. Still, she knew she could hold her own, after all her years as Cat’s assistant. _I will not be intimidated, even if she’s brilliant and successful and rich - and gorgeous! So is Cat, and I earned her respect._

Deciding that the best defense was a good offense, once their drinks came, Kara opened with, mischievously, “So there’s another thing I wanted to ask you about after I read up on you: is chess _actually_ a sport? Doesn’t look that athletic to me.”

Lena sat up straight, and her eyes flashed. “It absolutely _is_ a sport! It takes far more stamina than people realize. Way more exhausting - physically and mentally - than chasing a ball around for a couple hours.”

“You’re only saying that because you were a varsity chess player at MIT,” Kara teased. “Did you get voted queen of the nerds?”

“Oh you. First of all, matches can last eight hours...”

One drink became three, and Kara learned that Lena could talk about anything and make it interesting. Chess, short-selling, Russian history, water filtration systems, Velasquez - she had rarely had such a wide-ranging conversation. She had never experienced a mind like Lena’s up close. And Lena had a quick wit, but Kara could more than keep up. She was enjoying herself so much she even forgot about eating dinner.

Lena seemed relaxed, bantering playfully with Kara, her eyes sparkling. She was explaining how the growing conditions for Syrah in Australia were different than the Rhône Valley, when Kara’s stomach rumbled loudly enough to be heard over the clinking glassware and din of the bar. 

Kara flushed with embarrassment, but Lena said apologetically, “Here I am, carrying on. You must have somewhere to be on a Friday night?”

“Actually no, I was just going to go home and eat leftovers and sleep. Wow, I can’t believe it‘s nine o’clock already! We should get going!” Now that she was aware of her hunger, Kara could think of nothing else. She took out her wallet and attempted to catch their waiter’s eye. 

Lena seemed mystified by Kara’s sudden rush to leave, and put her hand on Kara’s arm to slow her. “Hold on, I asked you here, didn’t I?”

“Thank you! But I am happy to pay my way.”

“It’s already on my tab. And also,” Lena leaned over conspiratorially, close enough for Kara to breathe in the scent of her perfume, “I’m a minority owner.”

“Of course you are…” Kara rolled her eyes theatrically. “Let me get the next one?” 

Lena nodded. Her hand lingered on Kara’s arm for a moment before she reached down to get her bag. 

They edged out of the booth, and Lena thanked their waiter, who stood at attention as he let them pass. The bar had filled up, with every table full of smartly dressed, beautiful people. Some were discreetly glancing at Lena as she swept by.

Frank pulled up, and came around to open the door as they walked to the curb.

Lena paused. “Can I give you a lift home? It’s no trouble at all.”

“It’s fine. Thank you, but my place is pretty close! I can walk from here.” Kara wanted to fly home as fast as she could, as soon as Lena was out of sight.

“Oh,” Lena bit her lip. “Well, you seem hungry? There‘s a bistro around the corner that does good kale salads.”

The very last thing Kara wanted to eat right now was a kale salad. But it was obvious that Lena didn’t want the evening to end just yet, and if Kara were honest with herself, neither did she.

“How about this,” Kara countered. “Come back to mine and we can order in?”

Lena’s eyes widened, surprised by the nonchalant invitation. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, we could get pizza and watch a movie?”

Lena beamed, genuinely. “That sounds like fun. My feet are killing me though. Is it ok if Frank drives us instead of walking?”

“I suppose I could bear riding in your car again.”


	2. Chapter 2

Kara unlocked the door to her apartment and waved Lena through. 

“Sorry it’s a little messy. I wasn’t expecting to have guests! Please make yourself at home.” The thought crossed her mind that a billionaire might be horrified by how she lived, with her alcove studio and eclectic furniture.

She went over to the kitchenette and opened the fridge. “Want anything else to drink? I have beer and wine, but the wine is leftover from game night. Actually, scratch that - given how much you know about wine, it might be safer for you to stick to beer.”

Lena was looking around as she stood by the butcher’s block. “Just water, please. Three cocktails on an empty stomach is about my limit. I like your place, Kara. It’s cozy.”

Kara didn’t know if Lena was just being polite. “Yes, well, it’s home! Hey, what do you like on your pizza?”

“I’m easy,” Lena replied. “The only thing I don’t like are bell peppers.”

Kara got Lena a glass of water and ordered two large supreme pizzas, minus the peppers, and threw in some garlic knots for good measure. Lena furrowed her brow as she heard the order. “Are you inviting more people?”

“No, it’s just us!” Kara said self-consciously as she put her phone down. “I skipped lunch today and I am starving. I could probably eat a whole pizza by myself.” Kara was used to telling white lies to explain her enormous appetite.

Lena laughed. “Is this a common occurrence?”

“Uh, maybe? I could eat my weight in potstickers anytime. They are my absolute favorite! Anyway, the food should be here in a half hour. Do you want to borrow some sweatpants?”

“No, I’m fine. This dress is more comfortable than you’d think.” 

”Ok, but please take off your shoes; just looking at them makes my feet hurt. I’ll be right back.”

Kara disappeared behind the curtain into her bedroom and inhaled three protein bars to stave off her hunger. And she decided, sadly, that she couldn’t very well change into sweatpants if Lena was still dressed up in work clothes. She brought out a pair of socks for Lena, who had taken off her shoes and migrated to the sofa. Kara sat down on the other end.

“Thanks for having me,” Lena said as she accepted and put on the socks. “Most people wouldn’t look past my last name.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m usually not the type of person who gets asked to hang out.” 

“Huh, people don’t know what they are missing!” Kara said brightly.

“Yes, well... it’s fine. I have to assume they believe what’s out there about me.”

Kara thought for a moment.

“Cat worked incredibly hard to be where she is, and at least from what I see, she seems to enjoy the notoriety,” she observed. “But what’s it like for you?”

Lena took a sip of water, and said contemplatively, “I like that you’re direct, Kara.” 

Kara beamed. “I am! But you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

Lena looked down at her hands for a moment, then said softly, “Cat’s take on fame and mine aren’t comparable.” She paused, looking for the right words. “She got to decide who she wanted to be and what she wanted to be known for. I never had that. First it was ‘poor little rich girl.’ Then ‘genius heiress.’ And now... is ‘evil corporate bitch’ about right?” 

She laughed wearily.

“Cat also has people who knew her before CatCo was successful and she became, well, Cat Grant. But most people I’ve met know exactly who I am, and want something from me.”

“Not everybody wants to take advantage of you,” Kara said gently, suddenly feeling protective of her new... source? Friend? _Crush?_

“There are some outliers, but they are few and far between. You never know when someone will sell you out, even your family.” 

Her voice caught, but Lena recovered. “This is why I like journalists.” Her eyes met Kara’s coolly. “At least I already know you’re here to get your story, and there are clear rules of engagement, like in chess. I can usually trust in your professional ethics, even if I can’t trust you.”

Kara frowned. She wanted to protest that she could be trusted, but it probably would sound empty since they didn’t know each other well. And anyway, she could empathize with Lena. It had taken some time to adjust to Earth, to trust people, and to believe in the possibility of goodness after having lost so much. The road had been long, and one she was still travelling at her own pace. 

Still, it must be hard going through life thinking everybody was out to get you.

“Even if you can’t trust me,” Kara was sincere, “I just wish you had people you felt you could count on.”

They sat together in silence, with only the hum of the refrigerator in the background. 

After a while, Lena took a deep breath. “Look, I didn’t mean to be such a downer. It’s been a rough couple of weeks and I am tired, and suppose I don’t have my usual filters on. You’re kind to listen to me. I‘m normally not this self-pitying, and am sorry I haven’t been better company.”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Kara said sympathetically. “It’s ok to be tired, and also totally normal to not be ‘on’ all the time. What was going on that was so rough?”

Lena sighed. “My board isn’t fully behind my strategy. And so, even though I have a controlling interest in L-Corp, they can still make things difficult for me. I don’t really want to get into it right now.”

Thankfully, the pizza arrived just then. Kara jumped up to get the door. The mood lightened as they squabbled about which movie to watch; Lena was partial to documentaries and Kara was adamant they could not possibly watch something so utterly boring.

They compromised on _March of the Penguins_ and set their food up on the coffee table.

True to her word, Kara ate an entire pizza and nearly all of the garlic knots, trying to pace herself so she wouldn’t completely disgust her guest, who had daintily eaten two slices and was now engrossed in the movie. 

Kara stole a glance. Lena was curled up with her legs tucked under her, resting her head on the arm of the sofa. She watched the screen quietly, smiling whenever the penguins did something particularly adorable. 

Lena unexpectedly looked over at Kara, and their eyes met. Kara felt heat rise to her face, embarrassed to have been caught looking. Lena smiled to herself and turned back to the TV.

Kara was suddenly aware of the sharp angle of Lena’s cheekbones. And the hollow of her neck. And the curve of her hips. Time slowed to a crawl and she felt lightheaded. 

_Shake it off, Danvers!_

Kara didn’t dare look at Lena after that, so she stared straight ahead, watching penguins shuffle to the sea for the next twenty minutes.

“Kara!” Winn‘s voice crackled through the comms unit in her ear. “There is a bank robbery in progress on the south side we need your help with.”

“Sorry, Lena. Can you stop it for a second?” Kara whispered and ran to the bathroom. She closed the door, hissing, “Guys, this is my night off!”

“We wouldn’t have called you if it weren’t an emergency.”

“What’s up?”

“They have weapons that can melt concrete, and none of us can get close.”

“Ok, give me five minutes, I have to take care of something first.”

Kara was annoyed, knowing she’d have to abruptly bundle Lena out the door, which after such an unusual - yet enjoyable - evening didn’t feel right. But when she came out, she saw that Lena was fast asleep with the TV still blaring.

_Thank god._

Kara turned off the TV, covered Lena with a blanket, and launched into the night.

————-

Lena was still sleeping when Kara returned two hours later. After super speeding through a shower and putting on pajamas, Kara walked over to the sofa and crouched down, putting a hand on Lena’s arm and gently shaking her. “Lena... wake up! You fell asleep. Do you want me to call your driver?”

There was no response; Lena was completely out. She looked peaceful and somehow younger, and Kara wanted to caress her bare shoulder.

_She’s so beautiful._

Kara also felt, from deep within, an urge to mark Lena’s skin. She shook her head to clear her mind, turned off the lights, and got into bed. As she drifted off, her every thought was consumed by the woman sleeping just a few feet away.

————-

Around seven o’clock the next morning, Kara was startled awake by a thump. Lena had knocked a book off the coffee table.

“Fuck me!” Lena said under her breath as she tried to pick it up.

Kara poked her head around the curtain. “Hey! Good morning! You passed out while we were watching the movie... I tried to wake you but you were totally dead to the world.”

Lena looked disheveled, her hair coming out of its knot, her dress wrinkled and riding up on her thighs. She blushed and sat up. “Kara, I am so ashamed. I can’t believe I fell asleep.”

Kara’s stomach was suddenly doing flips, seeing Lena this soft and unguarded. _She looks like she just had sex._

“It’s ok!” she said brightly, trying to cover up her growing attraction. “You must have needed it. Bet you wish you had taken me up on those sweatpants though, huh?”

Lena laughed. “Yes. I do. And is there any chance you have an extra toothbrush?” She bent down again, snagged the book, and put it back on the table.

“I’ve got you covered! And I can get you a towel if you want to have a shower,” Kara offered, trying to rid her mind of the image of Lena, naked and wet.

“No, that’s ok…” Lena said. “I have a conference call at nine so I need to get back. But your couch is very comfortable and I slept better than I have in weeks.”

“Well if your meeting goes well, you know who to thank!” Kara grinned. “Ok, give me two seconds to find you a toothbrush.”

When Kara came out of the bathroom, Lena was by the window, studying the seascape displayed on the easel.

“This is really good,” Lena pronounced, with the confidence of a knowledgeable critic. “I can just imagine the wind sweeping through the harbor. Watercolor?”

“Yes, I‘m just learning how to use them. They’re different - a lot more finicky than acrylics.”

“It reminds me of Turner,” Lena said as she made her way to the bathroom.

“No way!” Kara scoffed.

“Take the compliment, Kara!” Lena said as they passed each other in the hallway.

Kara made a pot of coffee and had two mugs ready on the butcher’s block when Lena emerged. She had let her hair down and had wiped her makeup off. Her skin was fresh and glowing. Kara found herself contemplating the smooth column of Lena’s neck and the single freckle there, and quickly looked away. 

Lena accepted the coffee and perched on a barstool.

“Milk? Sugar?” Kara asked.

“No thanks, I like mine black.”

They sat there for a minute, drinking their coffees.

“This is _so_ much more civilized than a typical one-night stand!” Kara quipped to break the silence.

Lena almost dropped her mug. “Kara... we didn’t...?”

“I’m just kidding, Lena.”

Lena laughed, relaxing. “I do feel about as awkward though. I have never done anything like this before and am so sorry.”

“No, it‘s fine! My friends crash here all the time. It’s no problem.”

Lena’s expression grew serious. “I need to confirm though, everything is off the record, right?”

“Yes, Lena,” Kara said sincerely. “I wouldn’t embarrass you like that.”

They finished their coffees, and Kara walked Lena to the door. She didn’t know what to say. With anybody else whom she felt a spark with, it would feel natural to suggest getting dinner sometime. But she wasn’t sure if she should, because as long as she was writing about L-Corp, Lena was, in the end, a source. 

Lena put on her heels and a pair of sunglasses, instantly glamorous.

“Thank you, Kara.” Lena extended her hand formally, and Kara shook it. “See you around.”

“Have a good day,” Kara said as Lena walked down the hallway and around the corner. She felt a little melancholy as she closed the door. Lena was one of those people whose charisma was so strong, her presence lingered after she was gone. It had been a strange night, and Kara wondered if she would ever get to see Lena that vulnerable again. 

Maybe it was the superhero in her, but she also found herself wanting to soothe the aching sadness that seemed to bubble just beneath Lena’s confident exterior. But she had a story to write, and put those thoughts out of her mind.


	3. Chapter 3

On Monday morning, Kara headed to Snapper’s office to decide how to proceed with the story. When she had gotten her first lead on the artificial neuron program, Snapper had actually become supportive, albeit still in his curmudgeonly way.

She rapped on the door. Snapper was reclining in his chair with his feet on his desk, papers everywhere. He was reading a newspaper and swung his legs down when he saw her. He motioned for her to come in. 

“What have you got for me, Ponytail?” 

“She wouldn’t comment. And she wanted to get drinks! Off the record though.” Kara left out the part where Lena had accidentally stayed over.

“She asked you to get drinks?” Snapper was grudgingly impressed. “That’s good if a source likes you enough to want to socialize. And Lena Luthor would be a hell of a source. What did you learn that we could use?”

“Uh, it sounds like they got retroactive approval from the FDA to continue the trials.” Kara had called a few sources over the weekend but hadn’t been able to confirm what Lena had told her.

“Not bad.” Snapper nodded. “Normally Luthors stonewall and don’t give us jack squat.”

“I'll follow up with the FDA,” she said.

“If the FDA is giving out favors to L-Corp, that could be a big deal. Now get out of my office and get me my story, you piece of shit.”

Kara left Snapper’s office energized. This was her first piece of investigative journalism and she still had a lot to prove, but she felt she was starting to make her way. 

She had just gotten back to her desk and opened her computer when her phone rang.

”Hi Kara. This is Jess Huang.”

“Hi Jess!” Kara said, hoping Lena had decided to go on record. “What can I do for you?”

“Ms. Luthor is sending you something, but you need to be there to receive it. Can you be home at four today?”

Kara thought about everything she had to do that day. “I can’t, I’m sorry - have a lot of work here at the office.”

“I could send it there.”

What could require a personal delivery, Kara wondered. Was Lena sending her something about the trial? 

“What is it?" 

“I don’t want to ruin the surprise. She said she thinks you’ll like it.”

“Um, ok!” Kara conceded.

“Great, four o’clock then.” Jess hung up.

Kara patiently spent the rest of the day fact-checking and looking for contacts at the FDA.

A little after four, she looked up from her desk and saw an elegant man in a dark suit walking towards her desk, carrying what appeared to be a small wooden suitcase in his right hand and a package under his left arm.

“Mademoiselle Danvers?” he inquired quietly in a French accent.

“Yes?”

“Mademoiselle Luthor asked me to bring you these. Please keep this one,” he held out the suitcase, “standing upright. And do not bang it about, it is very delicate.” He handed her the package and carefully leaned the suitcase against the side of her desk. Then he pulled out a gold case and handed her his card. “In case I can be of service.” Then he spun on his heel and left.

The embossed print said _Jean-Pierre Rameau, Fine arts consultant_. Kara put it in her pocket, and peered over her glasses at the suitcase. She could make out a painting in a frame. 

_What on earth did she give me?_

A crowd had gathered. 

“Who was that, Danvers?” 

“Are you going to open it?”

“From a secret admirer?”

Kara waved them away. “Nah, nothing to see here, guys! Just some painting supplies I ordered.”

She quickly finished her work, got her things together, and took a rideshare home so she wouldn’t jostle the artwork on the bus. 

As soon as she got in the door, she flipped on the light and set the boxes on the butcher’s block. She opened the package first. It was a set of watercolor paints and a few sable brushes. They were obviously top-of-the-line. _Well, that was kind of her._

Then she opened the suitcase.

Cradled on all sides by thick grey foam was an ornate gold frame with a folder of papers sitting on top of the glass. Kara picked up the folder so she could get a look at the painting. It was a small, stunning watercolor of a tall ship on the water, riding high on the waves, nearly tipped over by a powerful wind. 

She opened the folder. The first page was a handwritten note on stationary.

“ _Dear Kara,_

_Thank you again for your hospitality and I apologize again for imposing. I hope you like this painting - it is part of my collection and I thought you might enjoy having it around. If you need any help mounting or taking care of it, Jean-Pierre can help._

_Yours truly,_

_LL”_

The other document in the folder was a copy of a notarized statement from Sotheby’s that laid out the provenance of _The Mouth of the River Humber,_ JWM Turner, painted 1824-1825, gouache and watercolour on paper - with the last line of the Owners section being “Lena Luthor, Metropolis, 2010-present.” 

Kara dropped the folder in shock. Here, in her kitchen, sitting on her butcher’s block alongside some crumbs from her breakfast, was an actual Turner from the golden age of British watercolors. 

Kara fumbled for her phone and called Jess.

“Jess! This is Kara Danvers. I am so glad I caught you. Can I speak with Ms. Luthor please?”

“Unfortunately Ms. Luthor is in meetings all day and then has a dinner engagement.”

“Oh, uh - can you ask her to call me?”

“She did say I could give you her number.”

Kara took down Lena’s number and thanked Jess, and texted:

_Hi Lena, this is Kara Danvers. Jean-Pierre stopped by!! Can you please let me know a good time to talk tomorrow?_

She put her phone down, shaking her head, still in disbelief. Fortunately, she had patrol duty that evening, so she could try to forget about Lena Luthor for a while. She changed into her suit, packed up the painting, and put the box at the back of her closet. Then she opened her window and was off like a shot.

———-

It felt good to do something physical and somewhat mindless, flying about the city and stopping a mugging here, putting out a fire there.

But Kara couldn’t stop her mind from wandering. What could Lena have meant by sending her the painting? Kara had always admired the drama of Turner’s seascapes, and it seemed as though Lena had picked up on that from her cursory glance at Kara’s latest amateur attempt.

Kara got back to her apartment around midnight. She changed out of her suit and got ready for bed, then checked her phone. 

[Lena Luthor, 9:05pm] _Is everything ok?_

Kara replied, honestly.

[Kara Danvers, 12:11am] _I’m a little confused why there is a Turner in my kitchen!_

The reply was immediate.

[Lena Luthor, 12:12am] _I‘m lending it to you_

Kara groaned. Lena was so literal.

[Kara Danvers, 12:12am] _Why?_

[Lena Luthor, 12:13am] _I wanted to thank you_

[Lena Luthor, 12:13am] _Don’t you like it?_

Kara didn’t want to hurt Lena’s feelings but she also felt uncomfortable.

[Kara Danvers, 12:14am] _No I love it! It’s just weird!_

[Lena Luthor, 12:14am] _What’s weird?_

Kara wasn’t sure how to respond. It was wildly, extravagantly, out-of-proportion as a thank you gift. On top of that, as a journalist she knew she couldn’t accept anything like this from someone she was covering.

[Lena Luthor, 12:17am] _Kara?_

Kara didn’t want a paper trail if they were going to discuss ethics.

[Kara Danvers, 12:17am] _Can I call you tomorrow?_

Her phone rang instantly.

“Kara,” Lena said, uncertainty in her voice. 

“Hi Lena!” Kara said. “So... thank you very much! But I don't think I can accept the painting.”

“Why not?”

Kara suddenly felt nervous, and her mouth started running. “Um, you probably saw, but my apartment gets way too much light and it gets pretty humid in the summer, so I shouldn’t have something fragile like this around! But more importantly, uh, I think it could be a conflict of interest since I’m writing about L-Corp… if that makes sense?” She held back about the whole thing being excessive, not wanting to offend Lena.

“Oh,” Lena sounded thoughtful. “You might be ok - I did look into giving it to you, but my lawyers said it might be an issue for that exact reason. So I thought lending it might be the next best thing, since no money is changing hands.”

Kara’s jaw dropped. “You were going to give it to me?” 

“Yes,” Lena said, matter-of-factly.

“Lena, you don’t have to give me a priceless painting every time you fall asleep on my sofa!” Kara was dumbfounded.

“Maybe not _every_ time,” Lena said slyly.

“Um... ok...” Kara fumbled. “Seriously though, it was very kind of you, and thank you for asking your lawyers! But I obviously need to get some guidance on what I can and can’t do, given that I’m covering your company.”

“I understand, Kara.” Lena’s voice turned playful. “Does this mean I can’t invite you to an event on Saturday?”

“What?”

“It’s opening night of the opera. There’s a gala. The people are bores and the food is not great, I will warn you. But the music is glorious and I would love to go with someone who might actually appreciate the staging.”

Kara took a breath. This was absolutely absurd. She decided to laugh it off.

“I’ve never been to an opera!” Kara said. “Aren’t there women singing at the top of their lungs in Viking helmets?”

“Why yes, there are - in some of them.”

“And you listen to this. By choice,” Kara teased.

“Yes, I do. And it’s thrilling... you might enjoy it if you gave it a chance.” Lena paused. “So... are you free?” 

“Uh,“ Kara hedged, “I... uh... am...” She was really drawn to Lena but going to an opera gala with her seemed completely over the top.

Lena picked up on the hesitation. “You know what? You don’t need to decide now. Just let me know, will you - maybe by Friday? And if you decide you want to hang onto the Turner, Jean-Pierre can get you a climate-controlled cabinet so you can take it out and look at it when you want.”

“That’s a thing?”

“It‘s a thing.” Lena confirmed. “I have a couple in my gallery here. Maybe you can come see how they are set up.”

“You are something else, Lena Luthor! Good night.”

Lena said softly, “Good night, Kara Danvers.”

Kara went to sleep, confused by what had just happened. 

_I’ll call Alex in the morning. She’ll know what to do._

————

Kara woke up early whenever she was preoccupied by a problem. And Lena Luthor was fast becoming a problem.

“Kara?” Alex groggily answered the phone.

“Hey, so... Lena Luthor sent me a painting yesterday! And she also wants me to go to the opera with her!” 

Alex swore loudly. “Kara! It’s frickin’ six a.m.! You couldn’t wait an hour to talk about this? I only got home from my shift at one.” 

“I’m sorry Alex, I woke up an hour ago and I waited as long as I could!”

“Ok,” Alex sighed, the long-suffering big sister. “Let me put on some coffee and you can tell me what‘s going on.”

“I can come over and make it for you?”

“You’d better. Also, you are buying me breakfast.”

Alex lived in the neighborhood over, and Kara was at her window in a blink. Alex, still in her pajamas, let Kara in and motioned, wordlessly, to the French press. 

Kara got busy, getting the beans from the freezer and crushing them in her fist. Alex sat down at the kitchen table and yawned. “Ok, so what happened?” 

Kara explained how the interview ended up with Lena staying over at her place.

“You invited Lena Motherfucking Luthor over to your apartment?” Alex was wide awake now.

“She wanted to get dinner! But I was so hungry, I didn’t think eating in public was a good idea.” Kara shrugged. She boiled some water with her eyes and poured it into the carafe with the coffee grounds. 

“You and Lena Luthor had a sleepover and you didn’t tell me all weekend?” Alex was aggrieved. “You withheld this critical information from me for three days? What kind of sister are you?” 

“I’m sorry, Alex! I was processing. I… I have a crush on her.” Kara blushed.

“You and half the city. Well, the half that doesn’t think she‘s bad blood. Go on.”

“So she saw my latest watercolor and then she sent me _the Mouth of the River Humber._ ”

“What’s that?” Alex had gravitated to sports and science growing up, not the arts, like Kara.

“A painting by a famous English artist.”

“Let me look it up,” Alex pulled out her phone. She typed a bit, then whistled.

“Kara, it’s worth over a million dollars!”

“I know!” Kara pressed the plunger down, came and sat down, and poured Alex a mug. “And, she actually said she considered giving it to me - can you believe that! I told her I probably couldn’t keep it, but then she invited me to the opera. Opening night.”

“As a date?”

“I don’t know!”

“I bet it’s a date,” Alex said. “You don’t give paintings like this and ask people to the opera if you just want to be nice.”

“Or, do you, if you’re Lena Luthor?” Kara wondered. “She donates a lot to charities and probably goes to a ton of these events; maybe this is just an everyday fun thing for her?”

“Maybe it’s like…” Alex thought out loud, “to you, a drink that costs $3 is not a big deal, but to someone counting every penny, it would be unheard of to spend that much. The Luthors have so much money, that painting is like $50 to her.”

“That is crazy when you put it like that.” Even when she had been Cat’s assistant and knew that Cat spent more on hair and clothes in a week than she spent on rent in a month, Kara didn’t really think about money that much. It felt like something she had enough of to live on, and if other people had more or less, wasn’t that just how things were? But now she saw that Lena’s wealth was something else entirely.

“You know,” Alex said, “it isn’t that different than you having super powers. You are so much faster than any human but you just do your thing, right? You don’t hold back because other people are slower.”

“Well I do, unless I’m being Supergirl,” Kara said, thoughtfully. “The weird thing is though, she talked about how everybody she’s met wants something from her, so if anything, she seemed sensitive about people using her for her money. Honestly, Alex, it sounded like a curse.”

Alex looked at Kara over her mug. “I would never want to be that rich. Comfortable, of course - enough to buy a house and support a family and have a few nice things - but that kind of money fucks you up.”

Kara nodded in agreement. “Anyway, what am I supposed to do?”

Alex poured another cup of coffee. “I can’t help you with the painting. You need to ask your boss about that. But I think, based on what you told me, that somehow you sparked her interest.”

“I don’t know!” Kara said. “How can you tell if someone is just charming and generous, or if they are interested in you?”

“Well, ideally they tell you. But otherwise you have to look at their actions. And to me, her actions seem romantic. So...” Alex became serious, “you need to be careful, Kara. I don’t know her at all, but Lena Luthor may be messed up in how she deals with people. She might think she can buy you. And she already sounds like she has trust issues. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

Kara knew Alex was right. As much as she was fascinated by Lena, she needed to proceed with caution. 

“It doesn’t matter anyway!” she said, giving Alex a hug. “I am writing my first big story and it happens to be about L-Corp. I don’t know if I can be friends with her, let alone date her. But… what I do know is that I am _starving_. Want to go to Noonan’s?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.tate.org.uk/art/artworks/turner-the-mouth-of-the-river-humber-d18151


	4. Chapter 4

Alex went back to her apartment to catch some more sleep after breakfast. And for the second day in a row, Kara went straight to Snapper’s office when she got to work.

“Ponytail, you did the right thing coming to me,” he said gruffly after she had explained Lena’s offer of the painting. “You have to return it. It’s worth too much, even as a loaner.”

“Yeah, I figured. And there’s another thing! She asked me to go to the opera gala with her on Saturday.”

“That’s manageable. But it’s a high-profile event and you will be photographed together. We’d have to disclose the nature of your relationship on anything you publish about L-Corp.” Snapper squinted at her. “So what are you? Gal pals?”

Kara was unbelievably embarrassed to be discussing this with her boss.

“No, uh...” She stared at her shoes.

“You sure she’s not trying to butter you up, Ponytail?” He was almost paternal. “You let her know you’re writing a story, and bam! She’s doing all this for you?”

”Maybe. I honestly don’t know.” Snapper had a point.

He said, more soberly, “Ponytail, you need to know that if you get too close to her, we’d have to take you off of anything related to L-Corp and its competitors. That is most of the tech world, so you’d be reassigned from your beat.”

Kara was taken aback.

“How close is too close?”

“Anything romantic. Or even a close friendship, if you can’t be neutral. On the other hand, a good source is worth its weight in gold. It’s a tough line to walk so keep me in the loop and I can help.”

“Ok, understood.”

He threw a pencil at her. “So get back to work!”

Kara texted Lena as soon as she got back to her desk. At least she could let Lena know about the painting, even if she still needed to think about the opera.

[Kara Danvers, 9:38am] _Hey I am sorry! But my boss says I can’t keep the Turner. I can ask Jean-Pierre to come get it. Thank you though_

She called Jean-Pierre and made arrangements for him to come by in the morning. Then she spent the next few hours continuing her search for a source at the FDA who could validate that L-Corp had been granted an exception for the trials. 

Around three, Lena responded. 

[Lena Luthor, 3:05pm] _I understand. I could stop by tomorrow and get it after work?_

[Kara Danvers, 3:06pm] _It’s ok! JP will get it in the morning. Does anybody ever call him that_

[Lena Luthor, 3:07pm] _LOL no, I think he’d quit if I tried. Can you ask him to bring it to my place? I can keep it here in case you want to study it_

[Kara Danvers, 3:07pm] _Sure_

Kara put her phone down and went back to work, but a few minutes later, it vibrated again.

[Lena Luthor, 3:10pm] _Want to get dinner tomorrow?_

Kara didn’t want to see Lena right now - not until she figured out what was appropriate. Fortunately, she already had plans for that evening; she had to be at the DEO to test some new technology for Alex. 

[Kara Danvers, 3:11pm] _I wish I could but I can’t! Am supposed to help my sister with something. Raincheck?_

[Lena Luthor, 3:12pm] _Sounds good. Let me know about the opera_

Kara breathed a sigh of relief.

————-

Friday rolled around, and Kara hadn’t had a moment to herself to think between stopping a crane from tipping over, blowing out a fire on the highway, and writing five shorter articles in three days.

She decided to go for a walk during her lunch break to finally sort out what she should do about Lena. It was a sunny day, and she meandered through the streets around CatCo, deep in thought. She found herself at a small park and flopped onto a bench to watch some ducks skim over the surface of a pond.

If only she had met Lena in some other context. She was definitely attracted. Lena was beautiful, and just thinking about her flooded Kara with such nervous energy that she couldn’t focus on anything else.

But physical attraction aside, the few hours they had spent together had felt so... easy. Despite what Alex had said about rich people being messed up, Lena was easy to talk with, easy to laugh with, easy to be with. Their chemistry felt real, and Kara knew how rare that was.

However, Kara wanted to be a great journalist who brought important truths to the public. Her powers were a fluke - an accident of physics - and of course she wanted to use them to help people. But somehow, the struggle of making something of her “normal” talents felt like it could ultimately be more meaningful. She couldn’t let her first big story become marred by the perception of bias, and Lena was complicating that. 

Snapper had also planted the seed of doubt about Lena’s motivations for being so friendly. But then again, as a journalist, Kara needed to be able to develop sources. So even if Lena was trying to manipulate her, this meant being likable and accessible - but apparently not getting too close. That was the crux: how close did she want to get to Lena? How close did Lena want to get to her? And why?

Kara sighed. The logical thing would be to keep their relationship completely professional until she published the story, and then she could reevaluate. 

_Do you agree, ducks? Am I making the right decision?_

One of the ducks paddled over and quacked. 

_It’s a sign!_

She pulled out her phone and wrote Lena a long text:

[Kara Danvers, 12:43pm] _Hi Lena, after giving it a lot of thought, I don’t think I can go to the opera with you! I need to be transparent with the public about my relationships, and worry that if we are seen together at an event like that, it could look like I am biased about the story I am writing. I hope you can understand! It was kind of you to invite me_

She went back to the office and wrapped up her work. A bunch of her coworkers were going out for a happy hour but she didn’t feel like it, so she made her excuses. As the city seemed surprisingly quiet, she went for a long flight around the desert after dinner. She wanted to be alone.

When she got back, she saw Lena had texted.

[Lena Luthor, 9:04pm] _I’m sad to hear that, Kara. Who will save me from all the vapid socialites? I’m kidding, I understand_

Kara knew she had made the right call. But part of her was annoyed by the unfairness of it all; why was her first major source someone she found so captivating, and who kept being so nice to her?

[Kara Danvers, 10:43pm] _Thanks, Lena! Have a great time!_

_————_

As Kara was putting two lasagnas in the oven for dinner on Saturday, her phone buzzed. 

[Lena Luthor, 6:02pm] _No Wagner on the program so you aren’t missing out on any sopranos in helmets_

[Kara Danvers, 6:03pm] _I am SO relieved..._

[Lena Luthor, 6:03pm] _LOL. Next time they do the Ring, I will let you know_

[Kara Danvers, 6:04pm] _I don’t even know what that means_

[Lena Luthor 6:05pm] _Wish you were here so I could explain_

Kara didn’t know what to say to that. Fortunately Lena’s next text came in right after.

[Lena Luthor 6:05pm] _Have to run, they are starting soon_

[Kara Danvers, 6:06pm] _Have fun!_

She hoped she was striking the right balance.

————

On Tuesday, Kara needed to cover the L-Corp press conference that Lena had mentioned at their first interview.

So at seven-thirty in the morning, she found herself at a L-Corp manufacturing plant outside of town, in a tan blazer and dark jeans, her hair up in a french twist, and press credentials on a lanyard around her neck. The building was enormous, stretching back as far as Kara could see. It was new and modern and smelled, not unpleasantly, of plastic and rubber and bleach. Pipes and electric cables hung from the ceiling, and large robots were lined up in rows like desks. A makeshift stage with a podium had been set up in front of one of the assembly lines. There were large flat screen TVs playing videos on a loop. A few rows of chairs had been set up in front of the stage for the press. 

Kara estimated there were thirty or more journalists there, along with TV and radio stations. She grabbed some coffee and a muffin from the continental breakfast that had been laid out, and made small talk with two reporters from the New York Times and the Washington Post. Kara knew the launch must be a big deal if those two leading national papers had sent their people. The agenda said there would be prepared remarks for an hour, followed by tours of the facility.

Kara felt a little on edge, like the anticipation she felt before a concert of a band she liked. A woman made an announcement to ask people to take their seats. Kara grabbed one towards the back. Then precisely at eight, Lena and a few other people walked up onto the stage. 

Lena stepped up to the podium. Kara’s mouth went dry. Lena was wearing a slim-fitting black suit with her hair up in a high ponytail, and had steel-toed work boots on her feet. There was a battery of flashes as the photographers took pictures. Kara was sure the images would trend; Lena looked hot.

Lena started her opening remarks. “Welcome to L-Corp. Thank you for coming. I’m Lena Luthor. As many of you know, one of my first initiatives as CEO was to harness our research to develop next-generation materials for spaceflight. And today, just three months later, we are pleased to announce that the first composite from this program has been selected by NASA’s Jupiter program, which has a mission to explore beyond the outer reaches of our solar system. We have begun small scale production here in National City to support a prototype of a revolutionary new spaceship. This is truly a great step forward for materials science and for our exploration of space.”

Lena seemed completely in her element. She was eloquent and humble and funny. She spoke for a few minutes to discuss the technological advances that made the new material possible, and two people came to the stage to show it off. They brought a large, thin, white square onto the stage, and tried to destroy it - hitting it with a hammer, setting it on fire, using a robot arm to try to pull it apart. It seemed indestructible, and light and flexible as well. 

Kara was taking notes, and she glanced up at one point and saw Lena looking at her. Kara blushed. Lena winked when they made eye contact, then returned to watching the demonstration. 

The rest of the session was about the Jupiter program, with a NASA deputy administrator speaking about the prototype and their ambitions. Then a moderator asked for questions. Kara put her hand up but wasn’t called. 

The session ended promptly at nine. Lena and the other speakers left the stage and headed off somewhere, while the journalists were split into small tour groups. Kara spent the next hour walking around the plant, asking the engineers the questions she had wanted to ask, such as how the material could be recycled if it was nearly indestructible, and what other applications they saw for it.

As the tour was winding down, Kara felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned and a young woman with an L-Corp badge said softly, so only she could hear, “Ms. Danvers? Ms. Luthor wants to speak to you.” The young woman led her over to a stairwell and up three flights of stairs to the roof. Kara blinked when they emerged; the sunlight was blinding after being in the plant for a couple hours. 

There was a helicopter on the helipad, the pilot walking around doing his flight checks. Lena was on the tarmac, now wearing sunglasses, talking to a group of her employees. 

Kara could hear the end of the conversation. “Thank you again, team. Well done.”

Lena shook hands with everybody and they all went back downstairs, except for two burly men in suits who looked like security.

Lena spotted Kara and the young woman standing by the door, and waved them over. “Thanks, Melanie. Appreciate your help finding Ms. Danvers.” Melanie beamed, looking overwhelmed that Lena knew her name.

“Hi Kara. Good to see you!” Lena exclaimed. With the sunglasses and the suit and the heavy-duty boots and the helicopter behind her and the wind whipping around, Kara thought Lena looked like she was starring in some ridiculous action movie. 

_Keep cool, Danvers!_

“Uh, good to see you too! Nice sunglasses.” It came out more sarcastically than she intended, as she was still taking in the somewhat ludicrous scene.

Kara couldn’t see Lena’s eyes because of her sunglasses, but her mouth curved into an amused smirk.

“Thanks, Kara,” Lena said, matching her tone. She smiled. “So, I noticed we didn’t get to your question during the press conference. Do you want to ask it now?”

Melanie stepped forward. “Ms. Luthor, I have strict orders to get you onto that helicopter by nine fifty-five.”

“Thank you, Melanie. I understand.” Lena glanced at her right wrist, where she was wearing a large square watch. She looked at Kara. 

“Do you want a ride back and I can do my best to answer en route?”

Kara thought about it for a moment. Any other journalist would probably jump at the chance to get one-on-one time and a quote from a CEO, so she guessed this would be fine.

“Um, sure!”

Lena thanked Melanie again, and she and Kara walked over to the helicopter. The pilot offered his hand to help them in. “You should take the front seat, Kara, the view is better,” Lena said considerately.

The smooth fabric of Lena’s pants clung to her thighs and butt as she hoisted herself up and clambered into the back seat. Kara couldn’t help but stare. She observed wryly to herself that the view was, indeed, better.

Kara thought about her parents to clear the lustful thoughts from her mind as she climbed in the helicopter. She put on her noise-canceling headphones and could hear the pilot radio air traffic control for permission to take off. The rotor beat above them and they rose into the air and headed towards downtown.

She had been in a helicopter a few times before, accompanying Cat, and had found the entire experience fascinating. Instead of the sense of freedom and calm that she normally experienced when she flew, helicopters seemed cramped and noisy and hot. And they smelled like motor oil. But she could see why they were so appealing to people who could afford it; it would only take ten minutes to get to L-Corp instead of an hour spent in traffic.

Lena tapped Kara on the shoulder, and her voice crackled through the headphones.

“Ok, go ahead.”

Kara opened her notebook and spoke into the mike.

“Thank you, Lena. The material you demonstrated today was based on advances made in a research lab at a public university, supported by publicly-funded grants. Will you be sharing your methods with the world to advance innovation, or does L-Corp consider the technology to be proprietary?”

Lena laughed.

“Kara! No softballs again. I’m kind of glad we didn’t get to you.” She paused. “Are you ready? Our mission at L-Corp is to inspire and empower the world with technology that changes lives. We benefit from being part of an open scientific ecosystem, and in return are eager to share the results of our work with the world. We have filed for patents on long chain nanotube composite manufacturing, so our methods will be in the public domain, with appropriate intellectual property protections. Got that?”

“Thanks, Lena.”

“Ok maybe one more. As head of R&D prior to my elevation as CEO, I negotiated the technology transfer partnership that led to this breakthrough. There is an important role for the private sector to play in developing applications based on early stage research. This was a textbook case for how well this handoff can work, and I am very proud of the team.”

Kara scribbled furiously to capture everything. There were some very usable quotes in there. It was impressive how Lena could rattle off corporate-speak. 

L-Corp’s helipad was coming into view, and Kara could see a tiny figure march out of the roof access doors, tailed by a couple more burly men in suits. It was Jess. 

Jess walked up to the helicopter after it landed and opened the door. She looked surprised to see Kara in the front seat. 

“Kara Danvers,” she said, fixing her with a suspicious glare over her glasses.

They climbed out and Jess looked at Lena, waiting for an explanation. 

“I needed to give her a quote about the launch, Jess,” Lena said, a tad defensively. Kara wondered about the dynamic between Lena and Jess. Some assistants ran their boss’s lives, and Jess looked like a strict taskmaster. She was already nudging them towards the doors. As they walked, the security guards a few paces behind, Lena tried to negotiate her schedule. 

“Can we push back my ten-thirty so Kara and I can get coffee?”

_Coffee? That wasn’t part of the plan._

“That is not advisable, Ms. Luthor. It’s a major Asian sovereign wealth fund.”

Lena nodded. “Ok. Is there anything I can move today?”

“Nothing. But if urgent, you could skip the reception tonight at the British Consulate.” Jess had Lena’s calendar down cold. 

“No... Emma told me I had to go so we can get the Sentinel deal over the line.” She glanced at Kara. “Kara, I’m sorry. I was hoping I had more time.”

“No problem at all! You sound busy,” Kara said sincerely. All of those meetings sounded high-stakes.

Decision made, Jess wasted no time. “Ms. Luthor, I can walk Kara out. Here are your briefing materials; you have fifteen minutes. Elliot is already in conference room A. And there’s a pair of Louboutins by your desk.” She handed Lena a packet of papers. Lena started reading the top sheet.

Jess called the elevators as soon as they were inside the building. Lena pushed her sunglasses on top of her head, and Kara was drawn again to her amazingly green eyes.

Lena said, “It was nice to see you, Kara, even briefly. Thank you for coming.” 

“You too. Thanks again for the ride!”

The down elevator arrived. “This is us,” Jess said to Kara. They got in and Lena waved while the doors shut. Jess stared straight ahead. 

Kara turned to her and said, “I’m sorry for the surprise, Jess. This was not planned, and I didn’t mean to cause you any trouble.” Kara had been an assistant not too long ago and knew what havoc even a minor schedule change could cause.

Jess nodded, as though accepting the apology. Then she said, “I might be able to squeeze you in for coffee tomorrow first thing.”

“No, that’s ok!” Kara said reflexively.

Jess looked at her thoughtfully. “Interesting. No journalist, to my knowledge, has _ever_ turned down time with Ms. Luthor. Even when she was head of R&D. I wonder why that is.”

Kara flushed. She wasn’t sure what to say. “I…”

Fortunately the elevator doors opened then, and Jess walked Kara out to the lobby and deposited her by the turnstiles. She gave her a knowing look. “Goodbye, Ms. Danvers. I expect I will see you again soon.” 


	5. Chapter 5

Kara wrote for the rest of the morning and filed her article by noon. After a quick lunch, she switched gears to try to learn more about how the FDA was organized and how investigational devices were approved.

The hardest part about writing this story was that it always felt like she was on the verge of a breakthrough. That if she pushed a little harder, or talked to one more person, or worked an hour more, she could unlock everything. She liked the discipline and challenge of chipping away at it, but it was very different from her work as an assistant, where she’d had the satisfaction of checking off tasks and being done when she left the office, or as Supergirl, where she could see the immediate results of putting away the bad guys. Now she had to play the long game, with an uncertain chance of success. 

She read all afternoon and even after she got home, eating dinner with her laptop in front of her. She was just starting to clean up when she got a text.

[Lena Luthor, 7:52pm] _Want to get drinks?_

Kara was confused.

[Kara Danvers, 7:53pm] _Aren’t you meeting the queen or something right now?_

[Lena Luthor, 7:54pm] _I wish! Although pretty sure it would be bad form to be texting in front of Her Majesty and I would not be invited back to the palace_

[Kara Danvers, 7:54pm] _Do you think the queen texts? Emoji, yes or no?_

[Lena Luthor, 7:54pm] _LOL. Definitely yes. Anyway I can leave once this speech is done? This morning’s launch was important to me and I want to celebrate_

Kara’s antennae went up. Celebrating a launch was definitely a step too far. 

[Kara Danvers, 7:55pm] _Hey I don’t think I should celebrate with you since I just filed an article about it! And I still have some work to do tonight. Sorry_

[Lena Luthor, 7:56pm] _Oh right. I’ll just grit it out then_

[Kara Danvers, 7:57pm] _Hope the wine is good at least?_

[Lena Luthor, 7:58pm] _Yeah, at least there is that. Have a good night, Kara_

[Kara Danvers, 7:59pm] _You too! Thank you again for the quote_

Kara put down her phone. Lena certainly was friendly.

———-

Lena hadn’t reached out in the next week and Kara had been happy to let sleeping dogs lie. She wrote a spattering of short articles and interviewed a start-up founder. And after a lot of legwork, she confirmed with a FDA lawyer - off-the-record - that they had in fact granted a rare exception for the artificial neuron trial. Now she needed to find out who and why. 

As Supergirl, she stopped an oil tanker from plunging off a bridge and saved a child who had gotten trapped in a duct. 

So, life was back to normal. Except that occasionally she would catch herself thinking about Lena - replaying snippets of conversations they’d had, picturing her asleep on the sofa, daydreaming about how she bit her lip.

On Saturday morning, she was speed cleaning the kitchen when her phone rang. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Lena’s name.

“Hi Kara. How was your week?”

“Hey! It was good. How was yours?” 

“Busy. I was in London and just got back yesterday. Anyway, I was calling because, if you aren’t doing anything this afternoon, do you want to go to the Museum of Fine Arts with me? There’s a new exhibition on Spanish portraiture, and you had mentioned you love Velasquez.”

Kara did love Velasquez, and it seemed Lena had remembered that detail from their first conversation. And this exhibition was a big deal: the MFA had managed to get the Prado to loan out Velasquez’s masterpiece, _Las Meninas,_ which it had never done before. Kara already had it marked on her calendar. 

Before she could stop herself, her enthusiasm took over. “I do love him! Wait... I thought that opened next week?”

“Yes... but,” Lena said, “I’m on the board… and the curator invited me to get an early look. And maybe we could get dinner after?”

_Dinner._

Was Lena asking her on a date? Or just being friendly? Also, could she go with Lena to an exclusive art showing? Would that look like Lena was doling out favors to gain more favorable coverage?

“That sounds... interesting...” Kara said slowly, stalling for time while she figured out what to say.

“But...” Lena prompted.

Kara bit the bullet. “Lena, I would love to go with you but I just don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“Ok,” Lena said evenly. “What is a good idea then? Do you not want to see me at all?”

Kara froze up at the question. She did want to see Lena, but for all her thinking about “‘keeping things professional,” she hadn’t really thought through what that meant practically.

Lena sighed.

“I get it, Kara. It’s ok. Have a good one.”

“No, wait! Don’t hang up!” Kara‘s brain reengaged. She decided to be honest. “Lena, you know I cover L-Corp and am writing a story about you...”

“Yes, you made quite an impression, so I am well aware.” Lena sounded amused.

“...so, there’s a line I shouldn’t cross as long as I am reporting on you.” 

“I get that, Kara,” Lena said, a tad impatiently. “It sounded like being seen at an event was the issue with the opera, and I see how you shouldn’t celebrate a launch with me… so tell me where the line is?” 

Lena seemed to be approaching things like the negotiator she was, looking to cut a deal, but there was a principle here that Kara didn’t want to lose sight of.

“The line is... where I can’t report fairly on you,” she said seriously. “If we get too close, I will be reassigned from covering technology.”

Lena was quiet. Then she said lightly, “Kara, surely one visit to a museum with me is not going to tip the scales so much in my favor? You aren’t _that_ susceptible to my charms?” 

“Well, no, of course not!” Kara felt the heat rise to her face. Lena’s glibness made her feel naive, but the truth was that she was worried about spending any time with Lena at all.

There was silence.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be flippant,” Lena said softly. “Look, I am not trying to throw you off your story, I promise. You know how my life is, Kara. I’m a Luthor. I don’t know anybody in National City. And I don’t meet a lot of people I like. And I like… you seem... I mean, I have... enjoyed our time together, and it seemed to me that you might have too. And I’d like to see where this could go.”

There was Lena’s vulnerability again, which tugged on Kara’s resolve. It was difficult, however, to agree to do anything with her without knowing her intentions, given that Kara had to keep things professional.

“As a source? As friends? Or... are you asking me out?” 

Lena was quiet for a moment, then said carefully, “I just want to see you again, Kara. Can’t we take it a day at a time? We don’t have to label it. Just... come to the museum with me. Or if you don’t want to do that, then let’s just get drinks? And if it helps, I do occasionally meet other journalists socially.”

Kara wavered. 

_I’m unbelievably attracted to her._

_But how can I do my job if I can’t develop a source?_

_To hell with it._

“Ok.” 

“Ok?” Lena sounded slightly surprised, as though she hadn’t quite believed her argument would win Kara over. “The museum? Or drinks?” 

“The museum,” Kara said. “I’ve been dying to see _Las Meninas_.” Drinks would be dangerous, she figured. At least at a museum, she could look at the paintings, instead of just at Lena.

“Me too,” said Lena, happily. “Meet me at four at the entrance?”

“Ok. See you soon.” Kara hung up and took a breath. Deep down, she knew she had just taken a step down a very slippery slope.

_____

The Museum of Fine Arts was a massive neo-classical building in the center of the city. Kara had loved coming here when she was a student at National City University, using her ID to get in for free, spending hours wandering through the slightly musty rooms with inspiration around every corner. Art had always been a way for Kara to connect - to understand humanity - as well as express herself, even her darkest feelings. So despite its columns and fountains and grandeur, the museum was a comfortable and familiar place for her. 

But today, the museum felt a little unfamiliar, the building a little more imposing. Kara waited nervously just inside the entrance, watching people come in and out. She could hear someone coming in close behind her, and turned around.

“Hi.” Lena walked up. She was wearing a fitted white shirt, black leggings and ballet flats, her hair down and perfectly blown out. Somehow she made even casual outfits look elegant, and she took Kara’s breath away. 

_She’s just a source. You’re here to see the art. Don’t make it weird._

“Hi Lena. Nice to see you!”

Lena started bringing her arms up for a hug, but Kara stuck her hand out so they ended up shaking. 

Lena ignored the awkwardness. “It’s nice to see you too, Kara. I’m so glad you’re here… and the exhibition is supposed to be spectacular. Shall we?”

She stopped at the information desk to pick up a map.

“I just joined the board a couple months ago, so I still don’t know my way around.”

They walked past the ticket collectors and wandered through the palatial halls until they got to the exhibition wing. There was a dark red wall with “Spanish Portraiture through the Ages” painted on it in block letters. A security guard waved them past.

The gallery was completely empty. Kara could hear her own footsteps on the parquet floors, and was aware of each breath she took of the slightly humid air. It smelled of aged oil paint and old wooden frames. Everywhere she looked, she saw paintings, spotlighted from above, that she recognized from her art history classes. 

She smiled and went over to the first painting, a Manet, to have a closer look. “Did you know the French expressionists were obsessed with Spain? They found it exotic!” 

Lena was watching her, also smiling. Just as she was about to say something, the curator walked up to them. He was a man in his fifties with floppy brown hair, wearing a tweed suit, with a plummy accent that Kara could not place. He and Lena air kissed and he thanked her effusively for her generosity in underwriting the exhibition. Then he proceeded to stand there and talk at them about the paintings and the historical and artistic themes he had wanted to draw out, especially Velasquez’s influence on painters who came after him. 

Kara was itching to actually go look at the art instead of talk about it, and was visibly fidgeting while he droned on in his academic style. Lena looked at her, green eyes sparkling, and elbowed her gently to stop. 

After what felt like an eternity, the curator walked them through the exhibition rooms, stopping at a few paintings to provide his commentary, culminating in _Las Meninas_ , the highlight of the exhibition. 

The enormous canvas, with a young princess and her servants at its heart, was mounted on a wall in its own room. Kara was so close she could see brushstrokes, and for a moment she could imagine the painting belonged to her. They were alone: just her, Lena, and a masterpiece. 

And the curator. “Ah, here it is, the crown jewel of Velasquez’s oeuvre, one of the most important paintings in Western history, it is a depiction of a scene in the Royal Alcazar during the reign of Philip the Fourth...” he said, starting up his lecture again as he turned towards the painting. Kara rolled her eyes and made a face. Lena grinned and mouthed a warning: “Behave!” 

When he finally finished, Lena thanked him for the tour and said how much she looked forward to hearing his ideas for next year’s programs. He was appreciative, and when she held out her hand, instead of shaking it, he made a show of kissing it before striding out the exit. They burst into laughter as soon as he was out of earshot.

Lena turned to Kara, eyes bright. “You are a child! What was wrong with James?”

“If you like words like ‘oeuvre,’ ‘ergo,’ and ‘Foucaultian’ - he’s amazing,” Kara grumbled. 

Lena stifled a laugh.

Kara didn’t want to be a jerk. “But I don’t want to get him in trouble, especially if you are pretty much his boss! He’s very knowledgeable and it’s an incredible exhibition, and everything he said was insightful. He’s just a little pretentious in his delivery, that’s all.”

“He’s a sweetheart once you get to know him,” Lena said.

“Yeah, I’m just being difficult,” Kara said. “I try to write for the average reader so am not used to all the big words he used. And I love this painting and he was kind of dull!”

“What do you love about it?” Lena asked. She seemed genuinely curious.

Kara loved so many things, she didn’t know where to start. 

“Well,” Kara said, “everybody Velasquez painted seems so real! Some of them look right at you, and you could swear there is intelligence there, even though their eyes are just a few splashes of paint.”

“I love that about him too,” Lena agreed. “Somehow their personalities come through from hundreds of years ago.” 

Kara nodded. “Exactly! And then this one is so strange and dark, with all the weird angles and doorways and mirrors. I love the atmosphere he creates, and the air of mystery. Who _are_ all these people and what are they doing?”

Lena leaned in to look at the princess more closely. “So what _are_ they all doing?

“It’s a little complicated. Ok, so this man with the crazy mustache who is painting here,” Kara pointed to a standing figure on the left, “is Velasquez. He’s painting something that we can’t see. And some people think that the mirror there,” Kara pointed to a frame with two small, blurry figures, “is reflecting the king and the queen, who would be standing about where we are - outside of the painting - if Velasquez were painting us. Which is amazing!”

Lena smiled.

“So, imagine we’re the king and queen, and our daughter and all of her servants come by. So then _Las Meninas_ is the ‘behind-the-scenes’ of our portrait session, from our point of view. And the servants - who are usually invisible and not worthy of capturing - are the subject of the real painting, even as we are the subjects of the painting-in-the-painting. It’s completely mind-blowing! And maybe what James meant by ‘Foucaultian,’ but I’m not totally sure…”

Kara suddenly realized she had been rambling. She looked over at Lena, who was not studying the painting, but looking at her with an unreadable expression on her face.

Kara felt like an idiot; she was blathering on when Lena was the one who collected multi-million dollar paintings. “Uh… I’m sorry to bore you, you probably know all this already! I talk too much when I’m excited.”

Lena pushed her hair behind her left ear, and said quietly, “Oh no, I’m not bored at all. You love it, Kara, and you know your stuff. It’s wonderful to see this with someone who is so passionate.” She slipped her hand into Kara’s, then abruptly let go. “Sorry,” she murmured and quickly turned back to the painting, blushing.

Lena’s hand had felt cool and soft. Kara looked down at the intricate patterns of the parquet floor, hyper-aware of Lena’s presence next to her, trying to ignore the spark she had felt when their hands had touched.

_Breathe._

Kara needed a change of scene. She pointed to the galleries behind them. “Hey! Do you want to go back and see the Picassos again?” she asked, trying to keep her voice at its normal level of enthusiasm. Then she casually put her hands in her pockets, to keep them out of Lena’s reach.

Lena exhaled slowly. “Sure, Kara. Lead the way.”

They walked back to the Picasso studies of _Las Meninas_ , neither of them saying a word. Then Lena said something irreverent about Picasso (“I know he was a genius, but he was _such_ an asshole”) that made Kara giggle, and soon they were talking and laughing as though nothing had happened. They walked around the gallery until a security guard came in to let them know the museum was closing. Kara couldn’t believe so much time had passed; it felt like they had just gotten there. 

Lena texted Frank to pick her up, and then she and Kara found their way back to the cavernous entrance hall. The museum was emptying out quickly, and they got caught in the crowd of people pushing towards the doors and spilling out onto the wide steps. 

They bumped their way down. Lena stopped when they got to street level, and said hopefully, “This was really fun, Kara. Are you sure I can’t convince you to come for drinks?”

Another invitation. Kara knew she couldn’t go. It had thrown her for a loop when Lena had reached for her hand. 

“I’d love to. But I just can’t.”

“Why not?” Lena asked, with a hint of frustration lacing her voice.

Kara fiddled with her glasses. “You know… I cover you, your company. I’m a journalist, you’re a source…”

“I’m also a person,” Lena challenged, softly but firmly. “You are too. We are more than our jobs, Kara.”

“I know! But...” Kara was struggling to articulate what she felt. “Lena, I need to get the story out before I can even think about this, and even then…”

Lena looked at the ground. 

Kara felt terrible. But it was better to draw a bright line.

Lena opened her mouth to say something, then shut it again. She sighed and said, “Ok, Kara. I understand the story means a lot to you. And I respect your principles. God knows most people don’t have any. If you change your mind, will you call me?”

Kara felt relieved. “Yes, Lena. Thank you for understanding.”

The Rolls had pulled up. Some kids were pointing at the car and yelling to their friends to come see. “Looks like Frank is here,” Lena said, smiling weakly. She leaned in and whispered into Kara’s ear, “See you around, Kara.” She gave her a hug and hurried over to the door Frank was holding open. He shut it gently once she was in the car and got in the other side. 

The powerful engine purred to life and the silver car glided away. Kara watched it go, then walked in the opposite direction and around a corner to an alley. The dream of the museum, and the feeling of Lena’s hand in hers, evaporated as she flew home through the cold night air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.museodelprado.es/en/the-collection/art-work/las-meninas/9fdc7800-9ade-48b0-ab8b-edee94ea877f


	6. Chapter 6

A month went by. Kara was on patrol around the city one early Friday evening, but her mind was on other things.

Had she made the right decision to draw such a bright line with Lena? 

She had hit a wall on the story. Government agencies usually leaked like sieves, but Kara could not find anybody who would talk about why L-Corp had been given an exception to continue the trials. She had also talked to some regulatory experts who said it was the first they had ever heard of something like this. A company would normally face an injunction and criminal prosecution if it didn’t report a trial to the FDA.

Kara had asked CatCo’s lawyers to file a Freedom of Information Act request to get the documents related to the decision, but knew it might take months to years for them to be released. She had been so optimistic about wrapping this story up quickly, but now the odds were looking like it might not pan out, or if it did, it would take a while. 

She had seen Lena once professionally, as she had covered a conference Lena had spoken at. Lena had been formal, calling on her (“Ms. Danvers from CatCo”) and giving her a good quote to run, but otherwise had politely treated her like any other journalist. Kara had felt a twinge of regret, but then she reminded herself that she had to see the story through. 

It would be humiliating to call Lena now, with nothing to show for the past month. It would be admitting defeat. Or worse, that she was compromising her principles. Kara still had her pride. 

But as she swooped around buildings, no matter where she was in the city, she could see the giant “L” on the tallest skyscraper, the lights on the top floor blazing like a beacon. 

_How are you, Lena? Have you moved on?_

Suddenly, she heard an explosion high above her.

Kara flew up towards the sound. The glass wall of one side of a penthouse apartment had been completely blown apart. Shards of steel and glass littered the floor of the balcony, the wind blowing dust and debris through the opening. It was eerily quiet and smelled like burnt plastic. She saw a figure crumpled on the floor right at the edge of the indoor space.

_Lena! Oh god..._

Kara felt the world fall away. She sped to Lena’s side, her heart pumping and nerves on high alert. 

Lena tried to sit up. Blood was streaming from a cut on her forehead. 

Kara had to remember she was Supergirl. “Ms. Luthor. Don’t move, you have a head wound.”

She x-rayed the rest of the apartment and the floors below, and didn’t see anything suspicious, so she gently helped Lena lie back down. She took off her cape and pressed it to Lena’s head to staunch the bleeding. 

Two security guards burst through a door. 

“We need a medic here,” Kara commanded. 

“We’ve called 911.”

Kara continued to stay with Lena, keeping pressure on her cut. She knew that head wounds tended to look worse than they were, but it was still extremely disconcerting to see Lena’s face smeared with her own blood. 

The first fire and police officers arrived, and a woman hurried over with a medical bag. “Supergirl, I’m a first responder.”

She knelt next to Lena and started her examination. The rest of the team fanned out across the apartment.

Kara didn’t want to get in the way of the medic, so she went over to the officer who seemed to be in charge, and let him know she hadn’t seen anything else nearby that looked like a bomb.

“Thanks. We’ll still call in the bomb squad, but that's good to know. We may not have to evacuate the building.”

“How else can I help?”

“Can you check the exterior for any other threats?”

“Certainly.” Kara was grateful for something to do. She flew out and systematically scanned the rest of Lena’s building as well as the surrounding ones. She didn’t find anything unusual, except for a camera pointed at Lena’s apartment in the building opposite. 

When she got back, there were at least twenty people in the apartment, as well as a bomb-sniffing dog, looking through all the bookcases, cabinets and drawers. Everybody was talking at once, their radios squawking.

Kara found the police officer she had talked to before and let him know about the camera. 

“Thanks, Supergirl. I’ll get a team over there to have a look.”

“What do you think happened, Officer?”

“It looks like someone booby-trapped the balcony door. She’s very lucky. The glass was bulletproof and probably absorbed most of the blast. But it’s a head scratcher how they got it up here; the security in this building should be airtight.”

Lena was sitting on her sofa with a blanket wrapped around her and a large gauze pad taped to her forehead, dried blood matting her hair, still holding the cape. She looked dazed and very small in the middle of the chaos. 

Kara went over and cleared her throat, and said brusquely. “Ms. Luthor, is there anything I can do for you?”

“No, I am fine.” Lena sat up and rubbed her eyes with one hand. She said weakly, “We have got to stop meeting like this, Supergirl.”

At least she seemed well enough to joke, Kara thought.

“I couldn’t agree more, Ms. Luthor,” Kara said.

Lena held out the cape. “Here. I’m sorry I got blood on it. Do you need it back right now? I could have it laundered for you.”

“It’s ok,” Kara said, taking it from her. “I am sure you have other things to deal with.”

“Thank you, Supergirl. Have a good evening.”

Kara wanted to make sure Lena was alright, but she wasn’t sure what she could do. Supergirl might swoop in and save the day, but nobody seemed to expect nor want her to stick around to handle the aftermath. 

“Are you on your own? Is anybody helping you?”

Lena sighed. “I’ll figure things out, Supergirl. Don’t worry about me.”

Kara didn’t want to leave Lena like this. “I could stay with you, if you wanted?” she offered, softly.

Lena tilted her head and looked at Kara for a few moments, appraising her. Then she said, politely, “Supergirl, thank you. I appreciate your concern, but I’ll be fine tonight. Perhaps you can stop by L-Corp sometime? I would love to talk to you when all this settles down.”

Kara knew it had been strange of her to offer, so wasn’t surprised that Lena had turned her down; they were barely acquainted and Lena was fiercely private. But at least she had tried.

“Of course. Good night, Ms. Luthor. Please take care and I wish you a quick recovery.”

Kara flew home. It was only seven o’clock but she changed into her pajamas. She was completely shaken. Lena had been targeted before; Lex had hired Corbin to assassinate her not too long ago. At that time, though, saving her helicopter had felt like it was just all in a day’s work for Supergirl. How things had changed. Kara was now utterly horrified by the possibility that Lena could have died today. 

She turned on the TV.

_“Breaking news: there are unconfirmed reports that Lena Luthor has been injured in a bombing at her apartment...”_

Kara watched for a moment. And then realized this gave her an opening.

_Damn it. Forget the story._

She turned off the TV and picked up her phone. Lena answered on the third ring. 

“Kara?” 

“Lena! I was watching the news... They said there was a bomb! Are you ok?” Kara was a good actress but she hated how fake it felt sometimes.

”No... I mean, yes...” Lena said haltingly. “I’m fine. But a bomb blew out an entire wall of my apartment.”

“Are you hurt? You must be in shock?”

“Hmmm, this is the third time someone has tried to kill me since I arrived in National City, so I kind of expect it now,” Lena said wryly. “I’m actually more surprised that you called, Kara.” 

“Hey! Ok, I guess I deserved that!” Kara felt flustered by Lena’s teasing, and also realized she hadn’t planned out what she was going to say. She started babbling. “Uh, are you ok? I know I just asked you that. I guess, if your apartment was blown up, do you need a place to stay? You must be tired? My couch is pretty comfortable, as you already know, but, just this once, I’d let you have the bed… if you wanted it, that is…” 

Lena laughed. “That’s very tempting, Kara. But Jess got me a suite at the Four Seasons. That said, I…” Lena’s voice grew serious. “I am glad you got in touch. I have a favor to ask.” 

“Sure.” 

“Can you... come stay with me?” Lena asked, her voice catching. “Just until Sunday morning? I hit my head and the medic said I should have someone with me in case I have a concussion. Jess is finding a nurse to watch me, but I’d rather it be you.”

Kara was astonished by the request. She got ahold of herself and said cautiously, “Hey, don’t you think a nurse wouldn’t be better? I wouldn’t know what to do if something were wrong! Although... my sister is a doctor, so we could call her if we needed help.”

”I am fairly certain I am fine - it’s just a precaution.” Lena sighed. “Look, I don’t want anybody who works for me to see me like this, and I don’t want a stranger around because I won’t be able to relax. I have one close friend in Metropolis but she has a daughter and I doubt she can come. I know you are writing your story... but I feel comfortable with you, Kara.”

Kara sadly realized that Lena really must have nobody else to help her, and her sense of duty kicked in. 

“Ok. Let me pack a bag and I’ll head over.”

“Thank you, Kara,” Lena said, gratefully. “I can ask Frank to come get you? When can you be ready?”

“Give me...” Kara thought about a reasonable amount of time for a human to pack, “twenty minutes.”

“I’m booked under Laura Kieran. Thank you again.”

Kara threw on clothes, got her things together, texted Alex to let her know she’d only be available for emergencies, and went down to wait for Frank. He pulled up in a black Mercedes and opened the door for her, saying in a slow drawl, “Ms. Danvers, thanks for looking after Ms. Luthor. I am real worried about her.”

“No problem, Frank. Thanks for coming to get me.”

Kara got in the car and buckled herself in. She was nervous. She was about to spend the better part of a weekend with Lena and she was knowingly crossing her own line. But, Lena had almost been killed and had asked for help. And Kara was only doing for her what she would do for anybody else, and what any other decent person would do in this situation if asked to step up. It was just the right thing to do.

Kara merely needed to keep her feelings in check so she could stay neutral in her reporting about L-Corp.

_I can do that, right?_

Part of her doubted that she could, but she quashed those thoughts as she rode in silence towards the hotel - towards Lena.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Small divergence from canon: Lena doesn’t have an apartment in National City at the start of Season 2.


	7. Chapter 7

The Four Seasons was in National City’s business district, not too far from CatCo. As Kara walked in, she admired how stylish it was. There were orchids everywhere and the light fixtures looked like sculptures. 

At the front desk, the clerk directed her to the private elevator for the presidential suite. A security guard with a crew cut was standing in front and stepped aside after confirming her identity.

Kara was whisked away to the top floor. When the doors opened, she found herself in a foyer with marble floors, a modern chandelier and a table with an enormous flower arrangement. To her right, the foyer opened up into a double-height great room with windows all along one wall. 

On one end, there was a sitting area with low, wide sofas and a giant flat screen TV. A grand piano stood in one corner. The middle of the room was the dining area; there was a long glass table and chairs, and a large alcove across from the window with a full chef’s kitchen, separated from the main space by a marble-topped island with barstools. And on the far wall, there was a fireplace flanked by another sitting area with two armchairs, a sofa, and a large leather ottoman. Everything was grey, white or black except for a few accent pieces. 

Next to the kitchen there was a pair of double doors that looked like a service entrance, and a hallway to the rest of the suite. Kara could hear the sound of running water over the classical music that was playing in the background. 

“Lena?” she called out. There was no response. Lena was no doubt in the shower. 

She put her bag down and walked over to the window. She could see most of National City spread out beneath her, lights twinkling. Were she not used to an even higher view, it would be breathtaking. She could also make out Lena’s penthouse with its blown out windows; already there was a crew putting up plywood.

“Kara?”

Lena walked out of the hallway. Her hair was down and wet and looked almost black, and she was wrapped in a thick white bathrobe. A large bandaid covered the cut and most of the bruise on her forehead. She looked tired and pale, and smiled shyly at Kara. 

Kara felt deeply protective.

_Get a grip, Danvers._

She walked over and gave her a quick hug. “Lena, I’m so glad you weren’t hurt.”

Lena stepped back and met her eyes. “It’s good to see you, Kara. I know you wanted some space, so thank you for coming.” 

“You were almost killed, Lena! Of course I‘m here,” Kara said softly.

Lena smiled weakly. “Are you saying that all I had to do to see you was get injured?”

Kara frowned. “Hey! I…”

“Sorry, I shouldn’t joke about that. I appreciate that you’re here, Kara.” Lena picked up a sheet of paper off the island and handed it to her. “These are the symptoms you need to watch for.”

Kara read through the sheet. “Nausea, blurred vision, headache, dizziness… do you have any of these now?”

“No, I feel fine. I‘ll let you know if anything changes. I am hungry, though. Have you eaten? I was going to order room service. Comfort food.“ 

Lena sat down on the sofa in front of the fireplace and picked up a tablet from the ottoman. Kara sat next to her and read the menu over her shoulder. “Do they have potstickers?”

“I think so. _Jiaozi_ \- pan-fried dumplings,” Lena pointed to one of the appetizers.

_Of course she would know that._

“Hmmm…” Kara said, “how many do you think they could deliver at one time? I, uh, didn’t have lunch again.” In her haste, she had forgotten to eat at home before she came.

“However many you want,” Lena said.

“Three dozen it is!”

Kara ordered and tossed the tablet onto the ottoman. She turned to Lena, who had gone quiet and was playing with her fingers.

“Uh, so…” Kara said gingerly, “how are you doing? Do you want to talk about it?”

Lena hadn’t seemed fazed when her helicopter had nearly plummeted out of the sky, or after she had shot Corbin, or even just now at her apartment. In fact, she seemed to have laughed off all the attempts on her life. But now she seemed introspective.

Lena watched the gas flames flicker on top of the fake logs in the fireplace for a few minutes, while Kara sat silently next to her. 

“Growing up as a Luthor,” Lena finally said, barely audible, “there was always the threat of kidnapping. But now I suppose I need to worry more about murder.”

Her voice grew bitter. “It’s horrible, you know, to be afraid of every door you open. And the worst part is that in my bones, I know this was Lex again.” She looked down. “I… he was so nice to me when I was younger, and I worshipped the ground he walked on, and now he’s… how fucked up is this?”

Kara could see Lena’s eyes watering and her lips starting to quiver. “Hey you,” she said softly, and pulled her in for a hug.

Lena put her head on Kara’s shoulder and began to cry in earnest, giant sobs that wracked her whole body. Kara tried to ignore how fragile Lena felt in her arms. She held her tenderly until her breathing was steadier. 

Finally Lena sat back and wiped her eyes. “I’m sorry, Kara. I didn’t mean to cry on you. It’s been hard trying to hold it together. I just… I have the best security money can buy - round-the-clock monitoring and threat assessments and everything - but even that wasn’t enough to keep him out.”

“Hey. Your security worked. You’re here, aren’t you?” Kara said gently. “And there is nothing wrong with crying after everything you’ve been through.”

“Oh, there is in my family.” Lena made a face.

“You don’t have to be like your family, Lena,” Kara said. “You _aren’t_ like your family. You’re already charting a different course.”

“And it’s putting a target on my back,” Lena said darkly. “I don’t know why he keeps trying to kill me… Revenge seems beneath him and doesn’t accomplish anything. I just don’t understand...” Then she abruptly stood up. “Anyway, there isn’t much I can do about it tonight. And I need to get dressed before people get here with the food.” 

Kara racked her brain for ways to help Lena relax. 

“If you want to take your mind off things, want to watch a movie with dinner? I’ll even let you pick one of those boring documentaries you love so much,” she deadpanned.

Lena cracked a smile. “Oh, you’ll _let_ me, will you? Don’t worry, I’ll find something good…” She added quietly, “And thank you, Kara, for listening. I feel better already.” She went back to her room.

Most people would be a wreck, living under the constant threat of death. But Lena seemed to be able to compartmentalize and move on. Her resilience was both impressive and a little scary to Kara. 

While Lena got dressed, Kara explored the rest of the suite. It had three bedrooms, a large gym, and a half bathroom off the hallway - it was like a luxury apartment. She put her bag in the bedroom next to Lena’s. There was a king-size bed that was already turned down for the evening, with the softest sheets Kara had ever felt. The marble-clad bathroom had a shower, a freestanding tub, and a cedar-lined sauna. It was stocked with full-size shampoos and soaps from a French brand she didn’t recognize, but looked expensive.

She wandered back out to the great room. Room service had arrived. Lena, now in a MIT hoodie and yoga pants, asked them to set up in front of the TV. They put down a starched white linen tablecloth on the coffee table and set two place settings side-by-side. Kara couldn’t imagine having service like this all the time, elevating a meal into something elegant. When Lena had come over that first night, Kara had just thrown the pizza boxes down, the grease leaking through the cardboard. It made her cringe a little now.

Lena thanked the servers, and they said their goodbyes and left. 

“So what are we watching?” Kara asked, sitting down on the sofa and putting her napkin on her lap.

Lena hit play on the tablet and sat down next to her. ‘The Mysteries of Medieval Armor’ appeared on the screen. She looked smugly at Kara, who groaned theatrically.

“Hey! You said I could pick!” Lena protested.

“Yes, I said you could pick - I didn’t say I would enjoy it!” Kara retorted.

“Just give it a try, Kara!” Lena said in mock exasperation as she hit ‘play.’

Kara’s potstickers had come beautifully arranged on a platter with a hibiscus flower as garnish. But she was hungry and dug in immediately, methodically stuffing one after another into her mouth. When she was about halfway through, she noticed Lena was observing her. The corner of Lena’s mouth quirked up in amusement.

“You look like a chipmunk, Kara.” 

Kara paused mid-bite and narrowed her eyes. Her cheeks were bulging a little but not abnormally so, she thought. “Not true,” she said with her mouth full.

Lena smiled. “Can I try one? They smell amazing.”

Kara moved her platter out of reach. “Nuh-uh. Not sharing! Hands off!”

“Please?”

“Get your own!”

Lena giggled.

They watched for a while; Lena ate half her mac-and-cheese and then set her bowl down to focus on the movie. Kara wouldn’t have admitted it aloud, and certainly not to Lena, but it was actually interesting. At one point, an actor poured molten iron into a mold, and Lena perked up. “Wait, they’re talking about medieval metallurgy!”

“You are _such_ a nerd.” Kara picked up the last potsticker with her chopsticks and brought it to her mouth.

Lena elbowed Kara in the ribs. “Hush now. Don’t be rude.”

Kara flinched in surprise and dropped the potsticker on her lap. 

Lena looked over and smirked. “Need some help with that?” She plucked the potsticker from Kara’s napkin and held it up. Kara moved to take it but Lena pulled it out of her reach.

“I don’t advise getting between me and my potstickers,” Kara grumbled, putting her chopsticks down.

“Oh? And what are you going to do about it?” Lena taunted, bringing the dumpling towards her mouth like she was going to eat it.

Quick as a flash, Kara closed one hand around Lena’s wrist, pinning it to the back of the sofa, and snatched the potsticker with the other. She grinned and said, “Are you sure you want to find out?” 

Kara’s tone had been light, but Lena pulled her arm back like she had been burned, and blushed to the tips of her ears.

Kara could hear Lena’s heart racing, and wondered if she had gone too far. She popped the potsticker into her mouth and turned towards her. “Hey, are you ok? I didn’t mean to scare you. I just wanted my potsticker back.”

“Yes, I’m fine.” Lena was inscrutable. “Sorry, let’s just watch.” 

But after a few minutes, Lena leaned her head on Kara’s shoulder and curled up against her. “Is this ok?” she asked quietly, relaxing into Kara. 

”Uh, sure.” Kara didn’t know what to do with her arm so she put it around Lena. She was lulled into a trance, aware only of the rise and fall of Lena’s breathing, the warmth of her body, the clean smell of her hair.

After a while, Kara looked down and noticed that Lena had nodded off. “Lena!” she whispered. “Let’s get you to bed.” 

Lena stirred, but her eyes stayed closed. Kara picked her up and carried her to the master bedroom. She gently laid her down on her bed, tucking her in as best she could, and shut the door. Then she called room service to ask them to come clear the dishes, and headed back to her room.

She was exhausted. Emotionally, it had been a hard day. The thought of losing Lena had been a wake up call. All the feelings Kara had been repressing for a month had come rushing back. Lena still took her breath away, and holding her had just felt… right.

Kara knew she was skating on thin ice. But her compass felt like it was spinning. How could she not comfort someone who was in pain? Where was the line? She didn’t know anymore. 

She fell asleep, wondering what the next day would bring.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning, Kara woke up around seven. She was ravenous.

She hadn’t prepared at all for this visit. How was this going to work, with her and Lena staying in the suite together for the next twenty-four hours? How would she get enough food? Already her stomach was tied in knots, like it was going to eat itself.

Kara listened for Lena’s breathing and heartbeat, and both sounded steady. She decided she could sneak out quickly and get breakfast, so she got dressed in a fitted t-shirt and sweatpants, put her hair up in a ponytail, and slid a note under Lena’s door:

_“Hey, went out to get sticky buns and coffee! Hope that is ok, I am hungry! Text me if you want anything.”_

She took the elevator down and waved to the security guard - a different one than the night before - as she left the hotel. A few blocks over, she found a bakery, where she ate three egg sandwiches and drank a latte. 

After having something to eat, Kara felt more clear-headed. She thought about it and drew a new line for herself: with Lena, she would act the way she would with a coworker, no more, no less. She could be herself, and she’d try to keep things light as best as she could. And if a coworker were having a tough time, she could be supportive and even be a shoulder to cry on, but she wouldn’t get too emotionally involved. 

Satisfied with her plan, Kara got a half-dozen sticky buns, a black coffee for Lena, and another latte for herself, to go. She also got an entire quiche to eat later in case she needed it.

Back at the hotel, she gave one of the sticky buns to the guard and headed back up to the suite. Lena wasn’t awake yet. But _the New York Times_ , _the_ _Wall Street Journal,_ and _the Financial Times_ were sitting on the kitchen island. It was like invisible fairies attended to Lena’s every need. 

Kara rooted through the kitchen to find some plates and silverware, and as she set the buns out, Lena padded softly into the room, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and yawning. She was still wearing her MIT hoodie from the night before, looking like a college student who had accidentally slept in, not a high-powered CEO. She sat on a barstool and blinked as she woke up. Kara melted, despite herself.

“Uh, morning!” Kara said cheerfully. “I hope it was ok that I went out? I was starving!”

She handed Lena her coffee. Lena smiled as their fingertips brushed together. “Yes, of course. Thanks for getting breakfast. You know you can get room service though, right?“

Kara passed the sticky buns and Lena took one. “Well, I didn’t want to bankrupt you, which could happen if you left me alone with that menu!” 

Lena laughed. “I think I just _might_ be able to afford to pay for your meals today.”

“I don’t know, Lena! I do like my food.” Kara crammed a large bite of a sticky bun into her mouth. It was flaky and gooey and the best pastry she had eaten in a long time, even better than Noonan’s. “Oh my god, these are sooo good.”

Lena giggled and she took a sip of her coffee. The corners of her eyes crinkled.

“You remembered my order.”

“‘Black’ is a piece of cake, Lena! Also, getting coffee was basically all I did at my last job so I’m pretty good at it.” Kara took another big bite of her bun. “So, how did you sleep?” she asked, her mouth full.

Lena looked at her affectionately. “I didn’t catch that, chipmunk. Can you say that again?”

Kara went red. She knew that talking with her mouth full was a bad habit, one that Eliza and Alex perpetually chided her about. She chewed and swallowed.

“Sorry!” Kara said. “I asked, how did you sleep?”

“I slept very well. I feel a million times better than last night.” She took another drink of coffee. “You know, it was a complete surprise to wake up in my bed this morning. You carried me across this huge room without me waking up? You’re stronger than you look, Kara.”

Kara flushed. She would need to be more careful. “Uh… you seemed really tired though. And I like to work out?”

Lena’s eyes flicked over Kara’s body and she bit her lip. “Did you play a sport in college?” 

“I rowed.” Alex had convinced her that joining a team sport might be good for her social life, and that she might enjoy rowing because she would at least get to be somewhat in nature. And Alex had been right; slicing through the water in the crisp fall air had almost felt like flying.

“That’s impressive,” Lena said. “I tried it for a week since it is such a Boston thing to do, like the Head of the Charles and all, but I couldn’t handle all the early morning workouts.”

“Yet _somehow_ you managed to join the chess team,” Kara said sarcastically.

Lena smacked Kara’s arm. “Hey! We actually had conditioning, just not so early.” 

“I see. Did you have to strength train all your fingers, or just the hand you use to pick up the pieces?” 

Lena put her sticky bun down on her plate and arched an eyebrow. “My fingers are plenty strong, thank you very much. Or at least…” she winked, “I’ve never had any complaints.” She mischievously ran her fingers along Kara’s arm.

Kara shivered when Lena touched her, and she nearly spit out her food. 

Lena laughed, looking pleased at finally getting the upper hand. “Maybe now you’ll stop picking on me about chess, Kara!” 

Suddenly she checked her watch and stood up, all business. “Hey, sorry, I need to go. I have a call with my public relations team in five minutes so we can get a statement out about the bombing. It shouldn’t be longer than a half hour. See you in a bit.”

Kara could still feel Lena’s fingers tickling her skin. “Uh, ok. Good luck!”

Lena took her coffee and plate and disappeared into the hallway. 

Kara took a breath. She had managed to keep things light, but maybe she was playing with fire. This was going to be a long day. 

She decided to take a cold shower to clear her head, and went to her room. She stood under the rainfall showerhead for a few minutes and felt re-energized. Compared to her bathroom at home, with its plastic curtain and mediocre water pressure, Kara felt like she was at a spa. She wondered if this is what money really bought: the mental and physical space to ignore the disorder and grubbiness of the world, like the way she could escape when she flew high above everything. 

As she got dressed in a button up and jeans, she heard piano music. She hurried out to the great room, and saw Lena sitting at the grand piano far across the room, her dark hair framing her face. Kara silently walked over and sat on the sofa to watch her. Lena’s fingers flew over the keys with a light touch, effortless and sure. Sometimes the tip of her tongue stuck out of the corner of her mouth as she concentrated. She looked intimidating and adorable at the same time.

Lena played for an hour, entirely from memory, Some pieces were wistful, some tumultuous, some propulsive. Kara just listened, mesmerized. How could Lena excel at everything - technology, business, and music too? 

When Lena finished, she stretched her arms and back, then came over to sit next to Kara. 

“That was amazing, Lena.”

“Thanks. I wanted to prove to you how strong my fingers are,” she joked. “No, seriously, it’s nice to get some time to play. I usually only get five minutes here and there.”

“It’s incredible you’ve stuck with it, given how busy you are. I quit music when I was eleven.” Kara had grown up playing the Kryptonian equivalent of the violin, but she had never been that good. While she had a decent voice, she had always admired people who could play an instrument.

Lena’s eyes clouded over. “Well… my birth mother played. And I have a memory - one of the few I have of her - of playing with my teddy bear under the piano while she practiced. So I am motivated...” she started tearing up. “I want to have something in common with her, even if she’ll never get to hear me play. I’m told she was very musical.” 

She looked up at the ceiling to try to keep her tears from falling.

Kara knew that pain all too well. She said softly, “I think she’d be proud of you, Lena. You play so beautifully. And I know how you feel. My parents died in a fire when I was thirteen, and even though my adopted family is incredible, I think about my mom and dad every day. I wish they could see what I’m making of my life.”

Lena looked at Kara through her tears.

“I’m sorry for your loss, Kara. It must have been so hard to lose your parents at thirteen. I don’t remember much of my mum, and I didn’t know my dad, but you had your whole childhood with yours. How did you cope?”

Kara was candid. “It took a lot of time. I’m lucky I landed with the Danvers. And I won’t say I’m over it; even today, I struggle with wondering what my life could have been if it hadn’t been for the… accident. But I’m figuring it out.”

“We have that in common then,” Lena said softly. “And I am sorry, Kara. I don’t mean to cry like this at the drop of a hat. My emotions are thwarting me at every turn. I must still be in shock.”

“It’s ok, Lena,” Kara said. Lena seemed to apologize every time she showed any strong feelings. “Even if you weren’t in shock, it would be ok.”

Lena wiped her eyes and changed the subject. “So… what do you want to do today?”

That seemed like the wrong question entirely.

“What do I want to do? What do _you_ want to do?” Kara asked. “You’re the one with the concussion!” 

“I don’t know…” Lena said, thinking out loud. “Jess canceled my meetings today but I have a few things I need to take care of. So maybe I’ll get that out of the way now. And then maybe read? I know… I’m boring. Oh! We could get a tasting menu for dinner tonight? The hotel restaurant has two Michelin stars. We might as well have a good meal if we’re stuck in here.”

“Uh, sure,” Kara said. She had only had a tasting menu once before in her life, at a fancy restaurant when she had graduated from college. It was amazing to her how Lena could have the most elaborate version of something on a whim. “But Lena, we don’t have to do that. My tastes are pretty simple.”

Lena smiled. “I like that about you, Kara. But it’s my treat. Any allergies or things you want to eat in particular?”

“No, I’m good.”

“Not even potstickers?” Lena asked as she got up. “I can ask the chef! Maybe she could deconstruct one. Dinner at seven? I’ll have housekeeping come in the afternoon too.” 

Lena went back to her room and Kara decided to read the _Times_. She was skimming some articles when she had an idea: she called down to the concierge to see if they could send up a chess set. She figured if she and Lena were going to spend the day together, they might want something to do other than reading or watching movies. 

Five minutes later, a man knocked and came through the service door with a mahogany board and a wooden box of pieces. He offered to set it up, and Kara was grateful as she didn’t know the first thing about chess. He put the board on the ottoman, then saw the dishes in the sink and took those with him on his way out.

Kara finished reading the front page and arts sections, and started on the crossword puzzle. She had done about half when Lena came back into the room.

Lena immediately spied the chessboard as she walked over to Kara, and her eyes lit up. “Chess!”

Kara put her paper and pencil down. “Hey! Uh, yeah, I’m sorry I teased you. Maybe you can teach me to play.”

Lena’s face broke into a smile. “Kara! This was so thoughtful of you.” She leaned over Kara’s chair and gave her a hug. 

_She smells so good._

_Don’t think about that._

Lena stepped back, now grinning ear-to-ear. “And I’d love to teach you. It’s really fun - you’ll see, Kara. Want to play now?”

Kara couldn’t help but smile back at Lena’s eagerness.

“Sure!” 

They sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the fire and put the board between them. Lena walked Kara through the basics, as well as a few openings. She was an enthusiastic teacher, teeing up scenarios and lavishly praising Kara whenever she understood a concept. 

Then they tried playing a game, and Lena took half of her pieces off the board to start. “Just to even things up.”

Lena won the next three games despite her considerable disadvantage, and they had started a fourth when her phone rang. She glanced at the screen, frowned, and put down the rook she was about to move. 

“Hi Rich.”

Kara watched as Lena listened to the voice on the other end. Her eyes darkened, and she sat up straighter, chewing her bottom lip. When she spoke, her tone was polite but pointed. 

“How is that possible when the door was there when I moved in?”

“Why didn’t it detonate until last night?”

“Ok, keep me informed.”

“What do you suggest as remediation?” 

“The apartment and the country house here. And then New York, London, Paris, Hong Kong - I’ll likely go at least once in the next quarter. And Ireland for Christmas but I can also postpone that if it isn’t feasible. Aspen, Tuscany, and the island can wait until next year. And the mansion - I rarely go there.”

“What do you ballpark?”

“Approved. Thank you, Rich. Appreciate you working the weekend.”

Lena hung up and sighed. 

Kara asked softly, “Are you ok?”

Lena put the phone down, closed her eyes, and rubbed her temples. “That was my head of security. Apparently the bomb was in the door frame itself. And ironically, it was probably one of the contractors who installed the bulletproof glass before I moved in who put it there.” She took a deep breath. “I’m more convinced than ever this was Lex; we use LLCs to hire any third parties, and besides my lawyers, only he would know the details.”

For Lex to go to such lengths was not surprising to Kara. But it still shocked her that he could organize all of this from his supposedly maximum-security cell. “That is... unbelievable. How are you feeling?” 

Lena looked up. “I feel better knowing we have a plan. We’re going to inspect the properties I’ll stay at in the next three months, and audit all of my staff and contractors. And we’ve already started to beef up physical security,” she said soberly. “Metal detectors, more cameras, that sort of thing. And you probably met Walter, Derek, and the team downstairs. I might need a bodyguard but I am loath to take that step; I have such little privacy as is.”

Kara didn’t know much about security but she assumed all of this would cost a fortune. Lena’s wealth was on a grand scale, but the complexity to maintain eleven residences seemed mind-boggling. She realized that Lena likely employed or contracted with hundreds of people around the world; her life was like a small business.

“That sounds like a huge hassle.”

Lena made a face. “It is. Maybe I should sell some of them. They are investments more than anything, like my art collection. Except for the castle in Ireland - that one is a money pit.” She sighed again. “Or I suppose I could hang onto them and rent them out.”

Kara could tell Lena seemed conflicted. “Do you like them, though?” 

Lena looked wistful. “I do. It’s comforting to stay somewhere familiar when travelling for work - it helps me bring my ‘A’ game. And it’s nice to have homes in a few favorite corners of the world. And they are all beautiful places.”

“Then don’t let Lex win!” Kara said defiantly. “You shouldn’t have to give up what you enjoy because he’s being a psychopath.”

Lena shrugged. “I know, Kara. It seems unfair. But I have to be realistic. I don’t stay that often, and locking down a few properties is a lot easier than eleven. And even I can admit that my life is a tad absurd. I don’t _need_ a private island in the Carribean I only go to once a year, if that.”

Kara grumbled, “I just don’t want the bad guys to win.”

“Me neither. But in the grand scheme of things...” Lena winked, “if I have to stay at the Peninsula in Hong Kong instead of at an apartment, Lex is not winning by much.”

Kara laughed. “True. Anyway, do you want to keep playing? I am curious how many more moves it will take you to kick my ass again.”

Lena picked up and moved her rook, smiling. “One. Checkmate.”

Kara stuck out her tongue and toppled her king. “I didn’t even see that coming! Rematch?”

As they set up the board, Kara wondered how much of Lena’s general approach to life was influenced by chess. Lena seemed to be able to quickly assess a situation, see multiple possibilities at each step, yet pull up and think about the endgame. Kara would fight to save each pawn; Lena would sacrifice a knight to position herself better for the future. She was pragmatic, even ruthless. She might not get what she wanted on each move, but she would get it in the end. 

Lena won the next four games, and then suggested they should order lunch. Kara found the tablet and ordered two dozen potstickers; it was a decent portion, and between that and the emergency quiche she had stashed away, she figured she’d be fine through dinner.

She handed the tablet to Lena, who ordered a salad and chuckled. “You weren’t kidding about potstickers being your favorite.”

“I would never kid about something as serious as food!” 

“What I want to know is, how do you look like that,” Lena waved at Kara’s body, “subsisting on a mono-diet?”

“It’s not a mono-diet, Lena. I eat pizza and sticky buns too. And ice cream.” Kara had all sorts of ways to explain her alien biology. “Um, high metabolism, I guess?”

“Lucky,” Lena said.

“Nah, luck is what you’ll need to beat me this time.” Kara said, trash-talking as she set the board up again. 

Lena cocked an eyebrow. “Oh really, Kara Danvers?”

“Yes, really, Lena Luthor,” Kara said with a straight face.

Lena rolled her shoulders back a few times. “Ready to play against all my men then?”

She beat Kara in eleven moves, slamming her bishop down. “Checkmate!” She beamed at Kara, victorious.

Kara saluted, grinning, and toppled her king for the ninth time. They set up the board again. The fire was soft and warm, and each moment stretched on as if they had all the time in the world. Kara watched Lena closely as they played, noticing the sly smile that danced on her lips while she contemplated the board, her long, slender fingers that gracefully picked up and put down the chess pieces, her bright green eyes that sparkled with delight whenever Kara made an unexpectedly good move. 

Kara wished they could keep playing forever.


	9. Chapter 9

After lunch and a little more chess, Lena said, hesitantly, “I know it’s anti-social, but I would love to go back to my room and read in bed until I fall asleep. I don’t ever get to nap!”

Kara was perfectly fine with that. Lena brought out some books for her as well, so Kara settled into an armchair, put her feet up on the ottoman, and took the top one off the pile. 

She had read a few chapters about Catherine the Great when her super hearing picked up on a loud explosion. As she zeroed in, she heard screams. 

Kara x-rayed Lena’s room. Lena was sleeping, three books piled next to her in bed. 

Kara quickly thought up an emergency that sounded plausible but not too worrisome, and also would trump looking after someone who could have a concussion. She scribbled a note for Lena and left it on the kitchen island.

_“Hey Lena, if you’re reading this, I’m not here. My mom got in a minor car accident and she needs someone to help her out. I know I’m supposed to look after you but honestly you seem fine. I’m sorry and hope you understand. I’ll try to be back by dinner but not sure - apologies if I don’t make it.”_

Kara changed into running clothes and waved to yet another guard on her way out as she left the hotel. She flew towards the screams; an apartment building had partially collapsed, and she spent the next hour and a half finding people who were trapped and holding up the building until everybody was out.

When she returned, housekeeping was just finishing their service. And Lena was still sleeping, so Kara tore up the note and flushed it down the toilet. She was hungry and tired, so she ate the quiche, took a quick shower, then lay down to take a short nap. 

But just as she was drifting off, her phone rang. She squinted at the screen; it was an unknown number. She answered.

“Kara Danvers?” a woman’s voice said.

“This is she.” Kara was a little disoriented. “Who is this?”

“I work at the FDA. My boss sent me to National City to give you some documents. Can you meet me tomorrow?”

Kara’s heart started pounding like it was going to come out of her chest. She sat up. 

“Yes, I can. I can meet you anywhere.”

“There’s a coffee shop, Helga’s, by the waterfront. Meet me there at 9.”

“I’ll be there. How will I know who you are?”

“I’ll find you.” The woman hung up.

Kara slowly put her phone down. This could be a big break for the story. It could also turn out to be nothing. 

Either way, it felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water on her head. The past day had been surreal; she and Lena had been in a luxurious bubble, watching movies, playing chess, teasing each other. And Kara had been letting her guard down as Lena had opened up. She was enchanted by this complex, wonderful woman. She felt admiration, protectiveness, desire, tenderness, even…

_Love. I’ve fallen in love._

The realization crashed over her like a wave. 

With growing dread in the pit of her stomach, Kara knew she needed to back off. She had been completely deluding herself about not getting too emotionally involved at this stage. She had been drawn to Lena for months now, and although she had tried to push down her feelings, they had been there all along, and were growing stronger by the minute. 

At this point, it was too late to cancel dinner; it would be rude, not just to Lena but to the chef. She could leave right after though, and she and Lena could go back to being journalist-and-source, not… whatever they were right now. At least until her story was published.

And then what?

Kara wanted love - the real thing. But how could a relationship - or even a friendship - work if it were based on lies?

Kara knew she lied constantly. It had become second nature to her; lies slid off her tongue as easily as oil around a hot pan. It hadn’t bothered her much before, but now she felt she was at a tipping point. What a farce it was to have to sneak food in, laugh off her metabolism, and make excuses to explain her sudden disappearances. It seemed like a cosmic joke that she was trying to be a principled, truth-seeking journalist, yet she was hiding who she really was.

Kara had read about spies who married without telling their spouses their true identities, and bigamists who maintained two families. When their secrets were inevitably revealed, the anguish they caused was heartrending. She couldn’t do that to someone she loved. So for any of this to work, she had to tell Lena the truth before anything happened. Lena deserved to know so she could make an informed decision about her future.

But there were two problems. 

The first was that Lena lived a life that - even if Kara were human - would be hard to adjust to. It wasn’t just her wealth and glamour and global lifestyle, although that all certainly was daunting. It was that she had a high-visibility job and was a minor celebrity. She was surrounded - like royalty - by people who served her, or wanted a piece of her, and she had twenty-four hour security with cameras and sensors and guards. It was a gilded cage; it wouldn’t be easy for Kara to maintain her privacy or get away unnoticed. How could she keep her secret under those conditions? It was impossible.

The second was that she didn’t know how Lena would take the news. Lena, who trusted no one, had somehow decided to take a chance on sweet, cheerful, ordinary Kara Danvers. And Kara had seen how devastated Lena was by her brother’s madness and betrayal; he wasn’t the person Lena had thought he was, and it had nearly broken her. So revealing that she was actually Kryptonian - not to mention that she was Supergirl - could be seen in the same light. Lena might accept her, but then again, she might not. 

And if she didn’t… it was likely that Lena would keep her secret. But Kara didn’t know for sure. Lena seemed - at least with her - to be affectionate and empathetic and good-hearted. Yet on some level, Kara feared how Lena might wield her power. She had seen that Lena was a realist, a pragmatist. Lena got things done and she cut deals for a living. As a CEO, even as she was setting a new direction for L-Corp, she was also cutting jobs and shutting down factories in the name of efficiency and profitability. Even her homes and art were viewed through the lens of investment, of some other value that could be derived. Could Kara someday become a knight on Lena’s chessboard, sacrificed for another objective? 

Kara couldn’t take that chance. If her secret got out, her family and friends could be targeted. There was real danger here, and not just for herself. So then, Lena could never know. And someday, perhaps, Kara could fall in love again with someone who was less of a risk - with someone less prominent, less powerful, less wounded, less transactional. 

Kara laid back down and stared at the ceiling for the next hour, completely numb. She heard the staff come in and set up, Lena get out of bed and take a shower, the whir of a blow dryer. Finally, a few minutes before seven, she decided she should get out of bed, and emerged from her room. 

The great room had been transformed. The dining table had vanished and in its place, there was a table for two by the window. Flowers and candles were everywhere. There were three servers and a man in a suit standing in the kitchen. The lights were low and jazz was playing softly. It was blatantly romantic. 

Lena was sitting on the sofa by the fireplace, reading a book. But now she was wearing a short black halter dress that showed off her long neck and her cleavage, diamond earrings, black stilettos with red soles, her hair up in a high ponytail, her lips dark red. She looked stunning, and Kara’s breath caught in her throat.

“Hey!” Kara said brightly as she walked over and sat down in the armchair next to Lena, trying to mask her roiling feelings.

“Hey yourself.” Lena put her book down on the ottoman and flashed Kara a dazzling smile.

“You dress up for dinner? Like on _Downton Abbey_?” Kara joked. She would use humor as a shield tonight. 

“I just thought it might be fun,” Lena said. “Also, I wasn’t about to come to dinner in my college hoodie, as much as I love it.” 

“Uh, ok. But I feel way underdressed!” Kara had changed back into her button up and jeans.

“Oh, please don’t,” Lena said, shyly. “You always look great, Kara.”

“Um, you too, Lena.”

The man in the suit walked over. “Ms. Luthor, Ms. Danvers, my name is Robert. I and my team will be attending to you tonight. We have a champagne on ice if you would like to start with that, or I can bring you an aperitif of your choosing.”

“Champagne would be lovely, Robert, thank you,” Lena said.

“And you, Ms. Danvers?” Robert asked solicitously.

“Um, champagne sounds good too.” 

Robert bowed slightly and went to go get their drinks. 

Kara’s mind was reeling. She didn’t know how she would make it through dinner with Lena looking like _that._ She glanced around the room - really anywhere but at Lena - and sighed.

Lena leaned over and put a hand on Kara’s arm, looking up at her with concern. “Are you ok? You seem distracted.” 

“Uh, sorry,” Kara said quickly. “I got caught up in some work before this, so I’m a little out of it.”

“I know how that is. Hard to turn off your brain sometimes,” Lena said sympathetically. “Do you need to take care of anything? We can push dinner back.”

Kara wanted to get this over with. “No, it’s ok. A drink will probably help.” Yet another lie.

As though on cue, Robert brought them their champagne. “Dom Perignon 2006,” he announced as he handed them each a flute.

“Cheers, Kara,” Lena said happily.

“Cheers.” They clinked. 

Kara sipped slowly. She stared at the tiny bubbles that rose in a line from the bottom of the glass and willed herself to relax.

_She is extraordinary._

_I’m going to miss her._

_I may as well enjoy this last meal with her._

Lena interrupted her musings. She said softly, “I wanted to thank you, Kara. I don’t know how I would have gotten through the last day without you. Somehow you know exactly what to do or say to cheer me up.”

Kara swallowed. “Uh, you’re welcome. It was nothing.”

Lena looked down. “It wasn’t nothing to me.”

Then Robert came up. “If you would like, ladies, we can start the service.”

They made their way to the table, and once they were settled, the servers brought an amuse-bouche to start them off - a spoon of caviar topped with carrot-scented creme fraiche. Kara had never tasted anything like it before.

The dinner that followed was nine courses, all exquisite, including the deconstructed potsticker, which was a savory mille-feuille with a shot of bone broth. Each course was paired with a different wine. Still, Kara was glad she had eaten in advance, as the portions were truly just a taste.

Kara did her best to hold up her end of the conversation. No one overhearing their repartee - Lena included - could have guessed that she felt like she was about to faint.

Halfway through the meal, the chef came upstairs to see how everything was. Lena was gracious and thanked her for the imaginative food and for taking time away from her kitchen to come say hello.

The servers were discreet and nearly invisible, but after her insight that Lena was always surrounded, Kara was sensitive to how many people kept shuttling in and out of the service doors. 

As dinner came to a close, a tray of chocolate truffles was set up on the ottoman for Lena and Kara to enjoy in front of the fireplace while the servers cleared the table away. 

Kara sat down on the sofa, and Lena sat down right next to her, so close their legs were touching. Robert came over and poured them some cognac. “Is there anything else I can bring for you tonight?”

“No, thank you, Robert. This was wonderful. Please thank your team as well; we enjoyed the evening,” Lena said. 

“Of course. Ms. Luthor, Ms. Danvers.” He and his team silently left the suite.

Lena turned towards Kara, smiling. “So how did you like dinner?”

“It was good!” The words came spilling out; Kara was uncomfortable. “Just not used to eating a meal like that. It was neat though! So many plates! They must have a zillion dishes to do. Do you eat like this often?”

Lena giggled at Kara’s stream of consciousness. “Not really. I used to love the formality and artistry of tasting menus, but now I usually find them pretentious. Once in a while, though, they can be fun.”

“Yeah I can see that.” 

They both went silent and stared straight ahead at the fire. In her mind, Kara practiced telling Lena that she needed to leave now, and that they had to go back to the way things were.

Lena seemed nervous. Kara could hear that her heart was beating faster than normal. 

Then Lena touched her hand to Kara’s arm. “Do you want your cognac?” she asked.

“Uh, sure.”

Lena picked up both glasses and handed one to Kara. She swirled her glass and slowly took a sip. Her lips shone in the firelight.

Kara could not rip her eyes away. She quietly watched Lena, trying to memorize each of her striking features, knowing it would be the last time she would see her like this.

Lena turned and noticed Kara staring at her. She bit her lip and took a deep breath. She put her glass down and draped an arm along the sofa behind them.

“I had a nice time tonight, Kara.”

“Uh, me too, Lena.” Kara felt frozen in place as Lena smoothly moved closer. She looked for the words to put a stop to everything, but nothing came out. “Um…”

Lena’s eyes searched Kara’s, then flicked down to her lips. She put a hand on Kara’s thigh and leaned in. “I’ve enjoyed being with you this weekend. I’m so glad we got to spend some time together.”

Kara’s body felt as heavy as lead. “It’s not like I had a choice!” she protested weakly. “There was a medical emergency.” 

“Really, Kara,” Lena said, brushing her lips up Kara’s cheek. She whispered in her ear, “there’s _always_ a choice.”

Kara could feel the softness of Lena’s breath and realized she had been holding hers. The air around them was electric. 

Lena slowly tilted her face in front of Kara’s, her eyes closed. She pressed forward, their lips just millimeters from touching, waiting for Kara to close the gap.

Kara wanted to kiss Lena more than anything. 

_What are you doing? Get out of here!_

She panicked.

She abruptly put her glass down and stood up. Lena’s eyes opened in shock and she almost fell backwards. 

“I’m sorry, Lena, I can’t do this!” Kara fled out of the room and down the elevator and into the night.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Mention of Suicide (Not a Main Character)

Kara flew home to her apartment and jimmied the window to get inside. 

This was the worst of all possible worlds. First, she had left all her stuff at the hotel. Which was just awkward. Second, whenever she got her story out, she would have to disclose something about their relationship, such as _“Ms. Luthor and the correspondent almost kissed, and the correspondent, a coward, fled the building.”_ Third, she was going to have to explain why she ran, and the prospect of facing Lena was too overwhelming. 

Kara got ready for bed, but couldn’t sleep with all the thoughts running through her head. 

_I should have left before dinner._

_What if she finds my suit in the secret compartment of my suitcase?_

_How am I going to explain myself?_

_How do I get my stuff back?_

About an hour later, there was a knock at her door. Kara x-rayed it and saw Frank standing there with all her things. She unlocked and opened the door, and he tipped his hat.

“Ms. Luthor asked me to bring these to you.” He wheeled her suitcase inside and handed over her phone and handbag.

“Thanks, Frank.”

He said as he left, “She was sad. Maybe the saddest I’ve seen her recently.”

Kara looked apologetic and said goodbye.

She glanced at her phone. She had two missed calls from Lena from around ten o’clock when she had bolted, likely before Lena had realized that Kara had left her phone behind.

The phone rang in her hand. It was Lena. Frank must have let her know he had made the delivery. Kara didn’t answer.

Then a text appeared on her lock screen.

[Lena Luthor, 11:08pm] _Kara, I am so sorry. Please pick up._

Her phone rang again. She silenced it, feeling too awkward to talk. Lena left a voicemail this time.

Kara would deal with it in the morning. 

———

Kara slept through her alarm and woke with a start at eight forty-five.

_Shit._

She quickly got ready and flew to the waterfront, putting the events of the previous night entirely out of her mind. At Helga’s, she bought a small coffee and a cinnamon roll, and took a seat in one of the vinyl booths. Each time the door opened, a bell tinkled and she glanced up, wondering if her source had arrived.

A tall woman with salt and pepper hair, wearing sunglasses and carrying a large handbag, stood up from a nearby table and came over. She didn’t sit down.

“Kara Danvers. Thank you for meeting me. I’m Jan Pauling.”

Kara looked up at her. “Nice to meet you, Jan. I appreciate you coming all the way from Washington. Would you like to have a seat?”

“No thanks,” Jan said. “This will be quick. I’m the executive assistant for Kenneth Overton, one of the FDA directors who oversees medical device approvals. Director Overton wanted me to give you this.” She handed a folder over to Kara. “Please leave me out of it. I’m just here because he couldn’t come himself. Go easy on him, ok? He’s a good man.” She left.

Inside the folder were copies of all the correspondence related to L-Corp’s artificial neuron trial application. There was a letter on L-Corp letterhead explaining the circumstances just as Lena had laid out in that long ago interview - that L-Corp had discovered that the trial had started without approval, and asking for an exception to continue for humanitarian purposes. There was also supporting documentation on the technology, the trial, and the merger. Finally, there was a record of the FDA's deliberations. Kenneth’s team had recommended an immediate injunction and criminal charges, but Kenneth had decided for L-Corp and stopped all further investigations.

Then there was a notarized letter, from just two days ago.

_“Dear Ms. Danvers,_

_I learned from my team that you are poking around, and I would rather you hear from me so nobody else gets in trouble. I’m sure it‘s only a matter of time before a whistleblower comes forward and all of this is exposed, and I don’t want any of my team’s careers to be derailed._

_My nephew has early-onset Huntington’s and is enrolled in the BioNeuron, now L-Corp, trial. He has done remarkably well due to the implants and has regained muscle control. It is a miracle._

_When the L-Corp investigational device application crossed my desk, I should have recused myself. But scientifically, the proposal was sound and would have been approved had it been filed. Some moron must have neglected to do so and then tried to cover it up. That’s the real crime here. Find out which BioNeuron executive lied to their own company and clinical investigators about having regulatory approval._

_L-Corp did the right thing by coming forward. And I realized that if we prosecuted, the furore around unauthorized testing in humans would lead to the trial being canceled and the device being shelved, as the study would have no results to publish. And my niece, who was not selected for the initial trial, and thousands of young people like her, would have no hope of getting better._

_Promising technology should not be tanked because of bad publicity. So I decided to let this go. The results will be published and speak for themselves, patient communities will be able to advocate for the next phase of clinical trials, and my actions here should become a footnote._

_Of course, the FDA will have egg on its face, and no doubt people will wonder about the corruption of the good people who work in our government. This is the reason I am writing to you; that I did this, acting alone - a sad man at the end of his career, whose wife died in a car accident, and whose only joy in life is his nephew and niece, whose minds and lives are being stolen by this terrible disease._

_In my 30-year career at the FDA, I have served faithfully and with high ethical standards. I have never profited from any decision. This is the first and last time I have lapsed. And while what I did was wrong, it also should not have any impact on patient safety. I doubt that any company considering human trials would look at this exception and conclude they can carry them out without approval._

_They will pull my pension and try to prosecute me. It will be too late, though; I am headed to Switzerland, because I too have Huntington’s, and I will be dead by the time you read this._

_I believe history will judge me kindly. And I hope you will treat me fairly when you write about me and my family._

_Sincerely,_

_Kenneth Overton”_

Tears were streaming down Kara’s cheeks by the time she finished the letter. Poor Kenneth.

She wiped her eyes and texted Snapper.

[Kara Danvers, 9:57am] _Major break. Got FDA docs. I will write up today_

[Snapper Carr, 9:58am] _Good work, Ponytail_

[Kara Danvers, 10:00am] _Also I stayed with Lena Luthor at her hotel this weekend. She needed someone to keep an eye on her after her apartment was bombed and asked me. She tried to kiss me_

[Snapper Carr, 10:00am] _Did you?_

[Kara Danvers, 10:00am] _No_

[Snapper Carr, 10:01am] _We’ll handle it_

Kara finished her cinnamon roll and flew home to write.

————

Kara worked the rest of the day, learning what she could about Kenneth, and sent a draft to Snapper that evening. She knew she’d written a great story. It was about life and death, personal misfortune and faceless bureaucracies, nature and technology, despair and hope. Most of all, it was about right and wrong: that what Kenneth had done was unethical but possibly morally justified. 

Snapper said there were some loose ends to tie up before they could publish: getting deeper on Kenneth’s life story, confirming that he had died in Switzerland, finding the BioNeuron executives whom Lena had fired so they had a chance to respond, and finally, giving L-Corp another opportunity to go on record about the program. They would do that at the last minute so L-Corp couldn’t pre-empt them before they ran the story.

Kara finally had a little time to consider what had happened with Lena. She picked up her phone and played the voicemail from the night before. 

_“Kara, obviously I misjudged things. Please call me back?”_

Lena’s voice was low and rough, like she had been crying.

Kara suddenly felt cold. It was too much, emotionally, to deal with all of this with everything she had to do for the story. 

Her phone rang at that very moment. It was Lena again. 

Kara stared at her phone and thought about answering, but decided to let it go to voicemail again. 

Another text came in.

[Lena Luthor, 9:42pm] _Hey Kara. Can we talk about this? I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable. Call me?_

________

The next few days went by quickly. Kara flew to Washington - her first business trip - to track down members of Kenneth’s family, and was able to piece together a sad, sweet profile. A Swiss correspondent managed to validate Kenneth’s arrival into the country and death by assisted suicide. And by the end of the week, Kara found the former BioNeuron regulatory executives whom Lena had fired and managed to get them on the phone; both had declined to comment and said they would lawyer up. 

Snapper resolved the pesky issue of what to call Kara and Lena’s relationship. Eventually he settled on “the author knows Ms. Luthor socially, and stayed with her once during an emergency.” It was the truth, albeit bleached of any context or emotion. In the unlikely event that anybody asked, the facts were that she and Lena had only known each other a few months and had interacted a handful of times. She had turned Lena down on several occasions and had kept things aboveboard. And she had appropriately removed herself from the hotel once she had understood Lena’s intentions. It didn’t quite sit right with her, but Kara made her peace with it. Her reporting was rock solid and she had remained neutral.

Snapper had, of course, chewed her out for not checking with him before going to stay with Lena (“You just about drove your car right off a cliff, Ponytail! What in God’s name were you thinking?”).

Lena had called and texted multiple times. Each message felt like an interruption, an annoyance, a stressor that pulled her away from whatever she was focusing on. Kara now just silenced the phone when she saw Lena’s name, and didn’t bother listening to her voicemails anymore. But the texts were unavoidable as they popped up in her notifications.

On Monday: 

[Lena Luthor, 5:45am] _Kara, text me when you get this?_

[Lena Luthor, 7:51pm] _Hey, I’m worried about you. Are you ok?_

On Tuesday: 

[Lena Luthor, 7:02am] _Kara, it’s been two days. What’s going on?_

[Lena Luthor, 11:32pm] _This isn’t like you. Are you avoiding me?_

On Wednesday: 

[Lena Luthor, 1:33am] _I know I crossed a line, Kara. I promise I won’t do it again. Please call me?_

[Lena Luthor, 10:47pm] _Kara_ , _I was wrong, and I am sorry. Please let me make it up to you_

On Thursday: 

[Lena Luthor, 11:23pm] _Please, just talk to me_

With each text, Kara grew more detached. And the longer she ignored Lena, the harder it was to respond. She’d first have to explain why she hadn’t bothered to text back, which came down to admitting how emotionally immature she was, before letting Lena know... what? She couldn’t tell her the truth, so she’d have to pretend that she was upset that Lena had tried to kiss her. And then she’d have to lay down the bright line again, which she didn’t actually want to do. Kara was tired of lying so it was just easier to push everything away, rather than buckle down and deal with the situation.

And anyway, she had her story to get over the finish line. Snapper said they would run on Monday because he didn’t want it to fall into the dead zone of the weekend. So she spent Friday working with her editor, and the rest of the weekend as Supergirl to distract herself from thinking about Lena. She was excited and nervous about publishing her first major story.

There were no more calls or texts. Part of her was relieved, another part was secretly disappointed.

On Monday morning, Kara let L-Corp’s media relations team know that CatCo was going to publish, and asked if they wanted to comment. 

[Lena Luthor, 9:42am] _Kara, I just learned you’re running your story about us? Is this why you’ve dropped off the face of the earth?_

[Lena Luthor, 10:12am] _Will you please just tell me what is going on? I’m going absolutely insane_

L-Corp set up a phone interview with a company spokesperson. She called him and he went on-the-record with L-Corp's statement, stressing their commitment to patient health and safety, as well as the promise of the technology. She incorporated the last updates and got everything over to her editors for final review.

[Lena Luthor, 11:32am] _I know you are using your phone. Did you block my number?_

At noon, her exclusive hit the front page. It took over the news cycle; the national papers and news agencies picked it up and reported on it. Cat called from her yurt with congratulations. Kara was even interviewed on a few network and cable news programs. 

She celebrated with Snapper and her coworkers that evening, but her heart wasn’t in it. It felt anticlimactic. Sure, writing an important story like this was an accomplishment, and she had made a big splash to start her journalism career, but all she could think of was poor Kenneth Overton and the tragedy of his life. And, of course, the weirdness with Lena.

When she got home, there was a package leaning against her door. She x-rayed it, brought it inside, and opened it. It was a simply framed print of _the Mouth of the River Humber._ A handwritten note said:

_“Dear Kara,_

_Congratulations on the scoop. It was beautifully written - and my money is on you winning a Pulitzer this year._

_Kara, I’ve been going out of my mind. Did I come on too strong - did I misread you entirely. I should never have tried to kiss you - I’m sorry._

_I miss you. I still want you in my life - whenever you’re ready. I can wait. I’ll stop bothering you._

_Yours,_

_Lena_

_P.S., the print and frame are worth $25. I hope you can accept them.”_

______

Kara hung the print on her bedroom wall. 

Remorse washed over her. She needed to talk to someone. So of course, she called Alex. “Hey, can I come over?”

“Sure… I thought you’d still be out celebrating with your work peeps?”

“Yeah, I wasn’t feeling it.” Kara hung up and flew over.

Alex opened the window and gave her a hug. “I bought a bunch of papers today. I’m so proud of you, Kara!”

“Thanks, Alex. I have a problem though.”

Alex got them some beers and popcorn, and Kara sat at the kitchen table and talked through everything that had happened with Lena. She even showed Alex the texts. 

Alex listened to the entire story and then set down her bottle. 

“OK, so let me get this straight. She tried to kiss you and you’ve ignored her ever since? And this is someone you _love_? That’s not cool, Kara. At least have the decency to talk to her. She’s hurting.”

“I know, I know.” Kara was completely ashamed of her behavior. “I know I need to let her go… it’s just… it's hard.”

Alex leaned over and gave her a hug. “I’m sorry, Kara.”

Kara let the tears come. It was such a relief to cry out everything she had bottled up for the last week, and really, the last few months. 

Alex sat for her for a while, then said gently, “But Kara, you are ending it already by ghosting her. And it’s a shitty thing to do. At least if you tell her that you need space, even if you don’t explain why, then maybe you can be friends once you’re over her.”

“I don’t want to be friends. I’ll never be over her,” Kara said bleakly.

Alex looked sadly at Kara and gave her another hug. “I know. Just give it time.”


	11. Chapter 11 - E

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Dubious consent

Kara knew she needed to talk to Lena, but she procrastinated. On some level, she missed Lena desperately and wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt - to just tell her everything and see what happened. Each time those feelings welled up, though, she managed to talk herself down; someone like Lena would always pose a risk to her. At the same time, she couldn’t bring herself to call to have what was essentially a break-up conversation. So she did nothing.

She was also flat out at work, reporting on the follow-ups to her story. The FDA had decided to bring criminal charges against the former BioNeuron regulatory executives, and also said they would review and might override Kenneth’s decision. But patient advocacy groups had demanded that the trial be allowed to continue. Kara was swamped with tips, information, and interview requests, and was struggling to keep on top of it all. Snapper assigned a team to help her, so she was managing other people for the first time too. 

On Friday, at the end of an intense week, she was at the office when Alex called her comms unit and told her to come to the DEO immediately. They had uncovered a plot to simultaneously assassinate seven heads of state the next morning.

Kara let Snapper know she had a family emergency and flew to all seven countries that evening, helping the teams there find the nearly undetectable bombs planted in their capital cities. She brought the deactivated devices back to the DEO and dropped them off with the munitions team to disassemble and trace. Whoever had planned this had sophisticated technology; it looked alien in origin. 

Exhausted, she headed home and fell into a deep sleep.

————

She awoke after just a couple hours. It was a few minutes after midnight. She was hungry and thirsty, and a little on edge. She ate a few protein bars and drank some water, then crawled back into bed.

_What is Lena doing, I wonder?_

The thought wouldn’t leave her mind. Kara lay awake and listened carefully, honing in on Lena’s heartbeat, then pulling back to hear the sounds around her. Kara could hear her typing on her laptop, as well as the clink of ice in a glass; Lena was probably drinking a whiskey.

Kara had never invaded Lena’s privacy like this before, but she figured it wouldn’t hurt to make sure Lena was safe. She fell asleep listening to the strong, steady pulse of Lena’s heart.

————

A few hours later, Kara awoke again, restless and unsettled. She had dreamt of Lena, sleeping naked in a garden, dark figures starting to encroach.

_I want her._

Desire flooded all her senses. Her heart was pounding in her ears and her entire body was tingling. In the blink of an eye, she was in her suit, flying like an arrow towards Lena’s heartbeat.

The night was cold and clear. She landed on the balcony of Lena’s penthouse. The floodlights turned on automatically from the movement, and a few moments later, Lena, in a short black negligee, opened the door from her bedroom. She was squinting as her eyes adjusted to the bright light.

“Supergirl?”

Kara felt possessiveness welling up from deep inside her. She moved slowly forward, her eyes sweeping over Lena’s body, the swell of her breasts, the curve of her ass, the definition of her calves. She could see that Lena’s nipples were hard from the cold. 

Kara was aroused beyond belief.

“Ms. Luthor.” Despite the raging lust she felt, she kept her voice steady.

“Is something wrong, Supergirl?” Lena looked at her, confused. “Why are you here at three in the morning?”

Kara scanned the penthouse for cameras. There were several on the exterior wall but none in Lena’s bedroom. 

“Why don’t we go inside? Kara Danvers wanted to tell you something.”

Lena looked pained, and she nodded. She walked back into her room, Kara following and closing the door firmly behind them.

“Is Kara alright?” Lena asked as she turned around, her arms folded protectively across her body. 

_I want her to know who I am._

Kara smiled.

“She is now. I had to see you, Lena.”

Lena took a step back, her eyes wide, looking at Kara. “Supergirl? You’re Kara?”

Kara grabbed Lena in a tight embrace and sped them towards the opposite wall. She trapped Lena there and pushed forward with her body, her knee between Lena’s legs.

“I am, Lena. And I missed you.” She brought her hands up to gently cup Lena’s face, and leaned in. She felt Lena’s breath hitch as, at long last, she captured Lena’s mouth with her own. It was soft and sweet and perfect. They kissed chastely until Lena moaned and parted her lips to allow Kara to sweep inside. 

Kara put a hand behind Lena’s head and pulled her in close, savoring the feeling of their bodies moving together. Lena’s lips yielded under her pressure. Kara pushed forward, gently thrusting into Lena’s mouth with her tongue. Lena tasted like honey and whiskey. It was intoxicating.

Lena tilted her face up, her eyes closed, breathing heavily. Kara took her time, nibbling down Lena’s sharp jawline, sucking at the soft skin of her neck.

Lena gasped. “No marks, please.”

_I want everybody to know she’s mine._

“Hmmm?” Kara sucked hard, sure to leave a mark. She caressed one of Lena’s breasts, pinching a hard nipple through the silk. Lena gasped again.

Then Kara ran her hand down and slipped it past the elastic of Lena’s panties. She smiled; Lena was soaked already. Her core rocked towards Kara’s fingers, but at the same time, she brought her hands up to try to push Kara away. 

“Supergirl... Kara, let’s stop, please? Can we talk first?”

Kara could not stop.

With her free hand, she grabbed Lena’s wrists and held them over her head against the wall, while continuing to pepper her face and neck with kisses.

“No talking.” Kara lightly ran a finger up and down through the wet heat of Lena’s slit, teasing her, circling her clit but not touching it. 

“Don’t you want this?” she mumbled as she nibbled on Lena’s lips. “I want this. I love you, Lena. I want you.” 

Lena was gasping for air as Kara teased and kissed her. She closed her eyes and surrendered. “I want this too,” she breathed.

Kara smirked and pushed two fingers a centimeter into Lena’s heat while holding her in place. She pulled her fingers out and ran them up and over Lena’s clit, then dipped back down and in, again and again, until the nub was hard and wet and throbbing. 

Kara could feel the heat radiating from Lena’s body as she got more wound up.

“Kara, please. Please stop teasing me…” Lena panted.

Kara laughed and sped them over to the bed, gently laying Lena down on her back, pressing her hands above her head, tearing off her lingerie. She sat back between Lena’s legs and took off her suit, pausing to admire the woman spread out before her, ivory skin glowing in the moonlight.

Kara traced down Lena’s collarbone and ran her hands all over Lena’s body, amazed at how soft and warm it was. She crawled up and took a nipple in her mouth, lashing it back and forth with her tongue. She bit it gently with her teeth and grinned when Lena cried out, arching her back. She switched her attention to Lena’s other breast, tormenting the nipple until it was raw.

Lena was desperate now. “Please, Kara. Please.”

She was still keeping her wrists locked above her head even though Kara was no longer holding them, her eyes closed, her muscles straining with need.

Kara had never seen anything so beautiful, so vulnerable, so submissive.

_I’m going to ruin her for anybody else._

She marked her way down Lena’s body and pushed her legs apart and back, holding her open, exposing her. She nibbled the delicate, creamy skin of Lena’s inner thighs, then took her thumbs and spread Lena apart as she breathed in the musky scent of Lena’s arousal. She could see all of Lena’s secrets now. Lena was glistening, her engorged clit jutting out lewdly, her pussy lips swollen and smooth, her wet hole waiting to be filled. Kara couldn’t wait to have a taste.

Lena’s eyes were closed, her head twisting from side to side as though in a fever dream. “Kara… Please touch me. Please.”

Kara shifted her body and used one hand to hold Lena’s lips open from above, while she bent down and took Lena’s clit into her mouth. Lena almost bucked off the bed when Kara’s tongue made contact, but Kara held down her hips so she couldn’t move. Lena tasted salty and sweet, and Kara wanted to devour her. She took her time again, sucking and releasing, tapping and swirling Lena’s clit around with her tongue, never stopping her motions but keeping the pressure too light for Lena to come. 

“Kara, just fuck me already,” Lena groaned. She brought her hands down and fisted the sheets, trying to push her hips up.

Kara was annoyed. She pulled her mouth away and sat up.

“Don’t tell me what to do, Lena.”

Lena whimpered at the sudden loss of contact. 

Kara spread Lena’s lips apart again with one hand so her clit was unprotected. With her other hand, she sharply spanked the swollen nub with her fingers. Lena cried out, her stomach clenching with each swat. She started thrusting her hips up to meet Kara’s punishing slaps as her clit got impossibly harder.

“I’m sorry, Kara. Forgive me. Please, Kara. I won’t do it again. Please,” Lena pleaded.

Kara smiled, satisfied that Lena had learned her place, and settled back down to continue her agonizingly slow torture. She nibbled and ran her tongue around Lena’s lips, her face slick with Lena’s juices. She cooled her tongue and licked up and down Lena’s slit, paying special attention to her throbbing clit. Lena couldn’t keep her body from thrashing. Kara used her hands to brace her open.

“Kara, please. Please let me come. I’ll do anything...” Lena seemed nearly delirious.

Kara felt triumphant. This once powerful woman was completely at her mercy. She decided to take pity on her, and pushed three fingers roughly into her silky heat. Lena was so wet, they slid in easily. Kara was finally inside her, claiming her, owning her. 

She thrust in and out, slowly at first, then fucking her faster and harder while continuing to tongue her clit. Lena’s cries grew higher and louder, and her legs trembled uncontrollably, and her core started to clench like a vise, and finally, she came, shouting Kara’s name.

Kara didn’t slow down as Lena pulsed around her fingers. 

“My god, Kara,” Lena groaned from above. “Thank you.”

Kara said, “You can do another. I know you can.”

“No, please. Stop. I... it’s too much, I’m too sensitive.” Lena tried to pull away from Kara’s mouth and futilely tried to push at Kara’s head with her hands.

Kara relentlessly tongued Lena’s clit. She took two fingers and searched for that rough spot on Lena’s front wall. When she found it, she stroked it firmly with her fingertips and Lena convulsed. 

“Kara… please.”

Kara used her speed to vibrate her fingers as she curled them back and forth. Lena was quickly aroused again, writhing and crying with pleasure. Then Kara abruptly pulled out and sat up on her knees.

“Sorry, you wanted me to stop?” 

“No, Kara. Please. Don’t stop.” Lena seemed on the verge of tears as Kara denied her. Her body quivered with need.

Kara smiled, reveling in the power she had over Lena. She leaned down and kissed her gently, caressing her face.

She slid two fingers back into Lena’s core, finding the spot once more. Kara could feel it swelling, getting tauter and smoother as she stimulated her from within. Lena’s sounds became unintelligible. Kara stopped and pulled out a few more times, enjoying Lena’s abject desperation as she begged for release.

Finally, Kara ordered, “Look at me. I want to watch you while you come.” She massaged the spot with her fingers, and used her other hand to rub tight circles on Lena’s clit. 

Lena opened her eyes and Kara gazed down into them. They were dark with shame and submission and lust. Lena struggled to keep them trained on Kara’s as ecstasy consumed her. With a choked cry, she came all over Kara’s hand.

Kara slowed her fingers and allowed Lena to come down. Lena was gasping for breath and had closed her eyes again, but Kara didn’t fault her for that. 

Kara kissed Lena on the forehead and moved her to the other side of the bed so she wouldn’t be in the wet spot. Then she laid down and spooned her from behind, pushing her hair to one side to expose her neck. 

“Kara,” Lena whispered quietly. “What about you?”

“This is all I wanted, Lena,” she said, holding Lena close to her. “Go to sleep.”

Lena soon was fast asleep, snoring softly in Kara’s arms. Kara stayed awake for another hour, nuzzling Lena’s neck and kissing her shoulder and back, content in the afterglow of finally possessing the woman she loved. She fell asleep just as the first slivers of sunlight pierced the dark of night.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Dubious consent. This one veers into non-consent, let me know if I should change the warning.

Kara woke up late; light was streaming through the windows.

The space next to her was empty, but the bed was still warm. Kara stretched out, looking around the bright and elegant room. She recognized one of the paintings on the wall; it was the Turner Lena had tried to lend to her. She would get it back. But right now, she felt an urgent hunger for Lena. 

_Where is she?_

Kara heard Lena’s heartbeat nearby, so she got out of bed and walked out into the living space, her feet silent on the marble floor.

There were two mugs, a strainer, and some loose leaf tea set out on the kitchen island. Lena was wearing a short blue silk robe with her hair up in a ponytail, her back to Kara. She was filling an electric kettle at the sink and humming to herself. Her neck was covered in bruises, and Kara swelled with pride to see Lena marked.

Lena brought the kettle over to its stand. Kara came up from behind and put her arms around Lena, hugging her tightly, smelling her hair.

Lena startled. “Oh! Good morning, Kara,” she said lightly, flipping the switch.

Kara started kissing her neck and Lena squirmed. “Kara, that tickles.” 

She turned around so they were face to face. She noticed Kara was naked, and giggled. “Can I get you a robe?”

“Why, Lena? I’m not cold.” Kara backed her up until they hit the counter. She boxed Lena in, arms on either side of her, and bent down to lick at her throat. “Quite the opposite.”

“I… I... would you like some tea?” Lena stammered as she turned her head to the side, as though trying to escape Kara’s mouth.

“No, I wouldn’t,” Kara said, as she kissed her way up Lena’s neck and face. She pressed in, forcing Lena to arch backwards, enjoying the smooth feel of the silk robe against her body.

Lena put her palms up against Kara’s shoulders. “Kara, before we fool around again, can we talk about last night? I was so surprised when you showed up, and I didn’t expect you to be so… assertive, or to be Supergirl, for that matter, but I...”

Kara leaned down to press a kiss to Lena’s lips, silencing her. Lena sighed and put her arms around Kara’s neck. She closed her eyes and kissed Kara back. 

All of a sudden, Kara’s comms unit activated. “Supergirl, please come to the DEO immediately. It’s an emergency.”

The DEO always interrupted at her at the worst possible times, to do the work they were too pathetically weak to handle themselves. Not this time.

Kara straightened up, ripped the earpiece out of her ear, and hurled it away from her, embedding it in a wall. Then she turned back to Lena.

“Now, where were we?”

A worried look passed over Lena’s face. 

“Kara... how... are you feeling?” she asked haltingly. 

Kara felt amazing. After all those stupid constraints she had placed herself under, trying to conform to the ethics of inferior humans, and being needlessly worried about her reputation and reprisals, she now had what she wanted.

“Never better.”

“You seem… upset?”

“I’m not upset,” Kara said. “I’m free. No rules, no lies.”

Lena asked softly, “What do you mean by that, Kara?” 

Kara ignored the question and sped Lena over to the sofa. She crawled on top of her, pinning her down. 

Lena looked up at her and flinched. “Kara, your eyes are glowing red.”

Lena smelled of citrus and sex, and Kara could not get enough. She brushed her lips over Lena’s face as she breathed in. 

“They do that sometimes,” she said in Lena’s ear, then gently bit her earlobe.

Lena tried to sit up, but the weight of Kara’s body kept her in place. She said hesitantly as Kara continued to kiss her face, “I… Kara… this is very enjoyable… but… I... I... want to know what’s going on.”

Why did Lena keep talking? It was getting irritating. To quiet her, Kara softly sucked at her bottom lip, making her whimper softly.

As they kissed, she started to run her hands over Lena’s body. Lena was breathing heavily, but then turned her head to the side. “Kara, please. Let’s slow down. We should talk.”

Kara’s eyes flashed. No one could tell her what she ‘should’ do. But she loved Lena and wanted to be patient with her. “What about?” she said as she nipped at the skin on Lena’s neck, marking her again.

Lena tried to find Kara’s eyes. “You seem… different. I’m worried something’s wrong.”

Kara smiled; Lena just needed some reassurance. She lifted her head up and gently stroked Lena’s face and hair. “Nothing’s wrong, Lena. I love you, and we are finally together. You love me, don’t you?” 

Lena closed her eyes and exhaled slowly. “Kara, this is all very sudden and you are… insatiable.”

Kara ran a hand down to Lena’s thigh and under the hem of her robe. “Is that so surprising, my love? You’re gorgeous.”

Lena sighed and said, “Ok, Kara. But let’s please talk after?”

Kara bent down to kiss Lena again. She started caressing Lena’s inner thigh with her fingertips, feeling the smooth skin there. She could hear Lena’s heart racing.

Lena turned her head to the side and glanced up behind Kara. Her eyes suddenly grew wide. She said weakly, “Kara… what‘s happened to you?”

Suddenly Kara felt a blast of heat on her back, and everything faded to black.

———-

Kara awoke with a start, immediately recognizing she was under the sun lamps at the DEO. She was in a flimsy medical gown and hooked up to monitoring equipment. 

She sat up and accidentally ripped a bunch of electrodes off her skin. The machines beeped and Alex came rushing in.

“Good, you’re awake. How do you feel?” Alex gave her a hug, then shined a light in her eyes and checked her pupils.

“Groggy. What day is it? What time is it?”

Alex turned around and entered a note into the medical record. “It’s seven in the evening on Saturday. You’ve been out since we got you from Lena Luthor’s apartment this morning.”

_Lena..._

“What happened?” Kara asked with a sinking feeling.

"There was red kryptonite on the bomb you brought back from France. We didn’t figure it out until the morning. The munitions technician found a shard while he was disassembling it, so then we went looking for you."

_Red kryptonite…_

Memories of the past night started to come to her in flashes. Lena, begging to be fucked. Lena, up against the wall. Lena, asking Kara to stop, and Kara, taking what she wanted anyway.

She felt dizzy and broke into a cold sweat.

“Oh my god. Lena. What have I done?”

Alex looked at her gravely. “What did you do?”

Kara started shaking. 

“Well…” she said, remembering but hoping somehow it was all a bad dream, “I burst into her apartment in the middle of the night, told her I was Supergirl, and... forced myself on her. And in the morning I almost did it again. So...”

Alex blanched. “Oh Kara… we gathered that you had been intimate, since you were on top of her and naked, and very... focused. You didn’t even notice our team getting into position.”

“Was she hurt? How is she?” 

“I don’t know,” Alex said. “She was bruised, and she seemed shaken. But she very politely asked us to leave her apartment as soon as we secured you. I tried to explain about red kryptonite but I don’t know how much sunk in. And she declined to make a police statement, as well as our offer of a medic or counselor, so there wasn’t much we could do for her.”

Kara abruptly started hyperventilating.

Alex came over and put a hand on her back. “Hey, breathe through your nose. Deep, slow breaths. Count it out.”

Kara counted to eight on each inhale and exhale and started to calm down. She felt like throwing up.

“Alex, can you send someone to check on her? I saw her after that bomb blew up her apartment. She was incredibly put together in the moment, but she fell apart later.”

Alex nodded. “Ok. We wouldn’t want to show up unannounced but I can call her. Although... it really didn’t seem like she wanted us there.” 

Kara knew Alex was right. Lena would rather suffer in silence than talk to a stranger.

The machines beeped again and Alex shut them off. She said, gently, “How are you?" 

Kara looked at Alex blankly. She didn’t know what to do. “I feel terrible. She probably thinks I’m a monster.”

“You were ‘under the influence.’ I think she understood that much.” Alex came and sat next to her on the bed, putting her arm around Kara’s shoulders.

“It’s not an excuse though, is it? If you’re driving drunk, you don’t get a pass for running someone over.”

“Right, but this is more like you drove impaired after someone slipped you something. Intent matters - you can’t blame yourself, Kara. Cat and I both forgave you.”

“I guess.” Kara was unconvinced. “I still violated her.”

Alex looked at her, concerned. “I know. Do you want a counselor? Or do you want me to stay with you? It might be good to talk this out instead of being in your head.”

Kara shook her head ‘no.’

“Ok.” Alex said, getting up. “Why don’t you try to get some rest then? I’ll order some pizzas for you; you must be starving. And then get some sleep. You’ll feel better in the morning and can decide what to do.”

The pizzas came a half hour later, and Kara ate all four, staring into space. Then she laid back down and tried to quiet her mind. But the self-loathing was overwhelming.

_How could I hurt her?_

_I’ll never forgive myself._

Kara cried herself to sleep.

———-

Kara woke up late the next morning. Alex came by, bearing a couple omelettes and toast, and cleared her to leave the DEO. She also mentioned that Lena hadn’t picked up when she had called.

Alex also asked again if Kara wanted to talk to a counselor. But Kara had decided what she needed to do: if Lena wanted, she would apologize and come clean about everything. And she would do whatever it took to fix things. 

She felt a surge of energy as she flew home. When she got inside, she quickly grabbed her phone and texted:

[Kara Danvers, 9:08am] _Lena, I am so sorry. If you will see me, I want to apologize and explain everything_

The response was immediate.

[Lena Luthor, 9:09am] _Thank you, Kara. I need some time_

Kara let out a breath, a little deflated. Cat had forgiven her quickly, and some small, naive part of Kara had hoped that might be the case here. Still, she was grateful for the text. And she felt deep regret; for the past two weeks, she hadn’t lifted a finger to communicate with Lena. But Lena - despite everything Kara had done to her - had given her the courtesy of letting her know the door wasn’t completely shut.

All Kara could do was wait, and hope.


	13. Chapter 13

Kara felt like a stopped clock, knowing that Lena was out there, processing. Life continued around her, but she was unable to move forward.

So, she threw herself into her work; having a routine got her through each day. She spent as much time at the office with her colleagues as possible, then would go to the DEO until midnight, trying not to be alone with her thoughts. 

On Tuesday, Kara covered the L-Corp quarterly earnings call along with one of the business reporters from CatCo. Lena talked about her strategy and answered a few questions from financial analysts. It was jarring to hear her cool, confident voice come through the speakerphone, knowing what she must be going through. But Kara was glad that at least on the surface, Lena seemed to be carrying on. 

Kara also debated asking Snapper about switching beats. But she realized this was no ordinary situation. Journalistic ethics seemed so quaint and innocent in what they were solving for, and didn’t seem to apply to something this bizarre. And with work going so well, it would be impossible to explain why she wanted a change. 

On Wednesday, Alex let Kara know that Lena had called her to learn about red kryptonite and ask if she could have the formula for the antidote so she could protect herself against future attacks. Alex had shared what she could, but had to deny the request for the antidote given the top secret classification of all DEO programs related to kryptonite. 

The conversation had turned heated, with Lena saying this was like the government having an antibiotic capable of killing drug-resistant bacteria that it refused to share with patients. Alex had said she understood, but that there was nothing she could do. All she could suggest was that Lena start the arduous process to receive top secret security clearance, and that she would try to get the application expedited. 

The DEO hadn’t yet been able to identify the source of the red kryptonite. But by the end of the week, some researchers had analyzed its molecular structure. It was slightly different than the kind Maxwell Lord had synthesized, and Alex said that might be one reason for its accelerated effects. She also had another theory that perhaps the first exposure had made Kara more susceptible to red kryptonite in general. In any case, the speed of onset was alarming enough that Alex staffed a team to develop an anti-red-kryptonite suit.

On Sunday afternoon, just as she got home after putting out a brush fire in a dry valley next to National City, Kara’s phone buzzed. Her heart leapt into her throat.

[Lena Luthor, 3:23pm] _Kara, I’m ready to talk. Can you meet?_

[Kara Danvers, 3:23pm] _Hi Lena. Good to hear from you. Let me know when and where_

[Lena Luthor, 3:24pm] _Come over? 5pm? I’ll put your name on the list downstairs_

[Kara Danvers, 3:24pm] _I’ll be there_

Kara spent the next hour pacing around, a nervous mess, practicing how she would apologize.

At ten minutes to five, Kara flew to Lena’s building. The sun was just starting to set, and vibrant oranges and purples painted the sky, but Kara was too caught up in her anxiety to appreciate the beautiful evening.

She landed nearby, changed into a black sweater and jeans, and put her hair up in a messy bun. In the lobby, the concierge waved her through to the penthouse elevator.

When the doors opened, Lena was leaning against the entrance wall, waiting for her. She was dressed simply in a short grey sheath dress, her feet bare, her hair down, with minimal makeup. She looked paler and thinner, but still radiant to Kara.

“Uh, hi, Lena.” Kara fidgeted with her glasses.

“Hi, Kara,” Lena said shyly, standing up straight. “Come on in.” 

Kara stepped out of the elevator and Lena led her into the main room. 

“Do you want something to drink? I have wine, beer, whiskey, soda, juice, water, coffee… tea...” 

“Um, just water please.” Kara sat down on one of the barstools, her leg jiggling on the crossbar.

Lena walked over to a cabinet and took out some glasses. Kara couldn’t help but remember how she had trapped Lena against the counter there and kissed her against her will. She turned bright red.

Lena got Kara some water and poured herself a glass of wine. She slid their drinks across the island and came around, sitting down next to Kara and examining her face. “Would you mind taking your glasses off and letting your hair down?” Kara did. Lena smiled at her. “You look nice like this, Kara. Sportier. I can’t believe I didn’t see the resemblance before.”

Kara was also surprised how well her disguise seemed to work. But she figured people saw what they wanted to see. She put her glasses back on and her hair back up, saying, “Yeah, I guess nobody expects Kara Danvers to be heroic or anything.” 

“I think that may change now after your story. Congratulations again, by the way,” Lena said sincerely.

“Um, thanks, Lena.” It had only been two weeks, but the story felt like it had been published a lifetime ago, and her job was the furthest thing from her mind at this moment. 

“I saw you on _CNN._ You were so articulate. I hate being on camera, and it seems to come naturally to you.” 

“Oh, I don’t know about that... ” Kara said, uncomfortably. She wanted to dispense with the small talk and address the elephant in the room. “Um, Lena...” she said, hesitantly, “sorry to change the subject. Can I… if it’s ok with you, I’d like to apologize for what I did to you...”

Lena tensed. 

“One sec,” she said. “I thought wine would be enough, but I may need something stronger.” She went over to the bar and knocked back a shot of whiskey. Then she poured some more into the glass and sat back down. She looked at Kara to signal that she could proceed.

Kara took a breath. 

“Lena, I don’t even know what to say. I forced myself on you, and I am so sorry for hurting you. And it also must have been a shock to learn that I’m Kryptonian. I feel like I owe you a complete explanation, if you want one... not that it excuses what I did. And I want to do whatever I can to make this right.”

“Thank you, Kara,” Lena said softly. “I’ve been trying to make sense of things, so an explanation would be very helpful.”

_Here goes._

“Ok... so my real name is Kara Zor-El. I came to Earth when I was thirteen and I’ve laid low ever since, as it never felt safe to be ‘out.’ There are only a handful of people in the entire world who know who I really am. And when I started using my powers as Supergirl, it became even more important to keep my identity under wraps, so my family wouldn’t become targets of anybody who wanted revenge on me. I hope that makes sense.”

Lena tucked her hair behind her ear. “It does. I would probably be conservative if I were in your shoes, too.”

“Yes, well,” Kara smiled sadly, “after all these years of keeping my secret, I hadn’t thought about what would happen if I met someone. And then, _you_ came along, Lena. And I kept you at arm’s length because I wanted to establish myself as a journalist. But underneath all of that, if I’m honest, it was also because I was... afraid. Afraid of how much I liked you, and how that would shake everything up.”

Lena was silent. It made Kara nervous and her mouth went dry. She took a sip of water. 

“At the hotel, after you almost died, I stopped seeing you as a source. And I… I realized I’d fallen in love with you. But I got scared and convinced myself that we could never work, because I’d have to tell you the truth about me if we were to have anything real, and that felt too risky. Not to mention that you live in a fishbowl and I didn’t think I could keep being Supergirl if we were together. And then we almost kissed… and I panicked and shut down.”

She met Lena’s eyes and said, “I should have just let you know that I needed some time instead of cutting you off. And I’m sorry. It was inconsiderate and hurtful of me.” 

Lena looked away and said quietly, “Thank you. I appreciate you acknowledging that.”

Kara paused to see if Lena would say anything else but she didn’t. “Do you want me to keep going?” 

Lena nodded.

“Anyway, a little over a week ago, I got exposed to red kryptonite. I’m not sure how much my sister told you, but it gets rid of my inhibitions, and I can get reckless and use my powers selfishly. Every impulse or urge I’ve tried to control just forces its way out. And the one I was most trying to control was… for you, Lena.”

Remorse overwhelmed her, making her throat close up and ache. “Lena, you asked me to stop and I didn’t care. I… I raped you, and I would have done it again,” she choked out. “And I am sorry. I am so sorry there is something in me that could do that to you.” Kara bit her cheek so she wouldn’t cry.

Lena looked down at her hands. “Kara… you didn’t rape me. I consented.”

“Only after I blew past your attempts to stop me,” Kara said miserably.

Lena took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. 

“I know, Kara. You did. But, it’s… complicated. That night, I wanted to stop because it was so sudden. But on the other hand, I wanted it... I wanted you…”

She picked her glass up and swirled it, watching her whiskey as it spun down. 

“Kara, I liked you from the moment we met... although it became quite clear you were unavailable.” She bit her lip. “But when you came to look after me that weekend... you were so sweet, and so irresistible, and I thought maybe I saw something shift in you… and I couldn’t help myself... I made such a hash of things when I tried to kiss you.”

She sighed. “I was kicking myself because I knew I’d pushed too far. And depressed because you obviously didn’t want anything to do with me anymore, and I thought we could have been great together. People like you don’t come along every day, Kara.”

Kara knew that Lena had felt badly about trying to kiss her, but she hadn’t realized how special Lena thought she was.

“So I had given up on you, and was trying to move on, but then… you, or rather, Supergirl, showed up out of nowhere, and… it was unexpected but I was… thrilled. And,” she blushed, “it was the best sex I’ve ever had. Even though you didn’t listen, I… when you… ravished me, I felt... wanted. Desired. And I fell asleep thinking, here was someone powerful, who said she loved me, who could protect me. From my brother. From the world.”

Kara had been trying to forget that night but the image of Lena in the throes of orgasm rose to her mind’s eye and made her blush too.

Lena took a sip of whiskey.

“But in the morning,” she said softly, looking into her glass, “you… I realized that something was wrong. It didn’t seem like you would stop, Kara. I still wanted you… but I felt powerless. And afraid. And... not quite used, but… objectified. And then all these people came in and saw us and I felt... humiliated.”

Lena’s voice had been neutral, but her words were damning. It was excruciating for Kara to hear. She started to tear up. 

“Lena, I never wanted to make you feel powerless or humiliated or any of that. I am so sorry for putting you through this. I hope you can forgive me.”

Lena was quiet for a few moments and then reached out and touched a hand to Kara’s arm. “Kara, I asked you here because I am trying to get past this. I know you’re not responsible for your biology and what red kryptonite does to you. So I don’t blame you for what happened. There is nothing to forgive, because it wasn’t your fault.”

Kara breathed a sigh of relief. “You had every right to blame me, Lena. So thank you.”

“But…” Lena ran a hand through her hair, “I’m still working through how I feel about you. I am still... attracted to you, especially now that we’ve been… physical. But I’m having trouble reconciling the kind, decent Kara Danvers I adored with how… utterly terrifying you were. I feel like I don’t know who you are anymore.”

Kara felt a cold wave pass through her. This was exactly what Lena had gone through with Lex. She said, helplessly, “Lena, is there anything I can do?”

Lena shook her head. “I don’t think so, Kara. I know it wasn’t _really_ you. But that’s part of the problem. And your sister said they don’t know where this last batch came from, and that is nerve-wracking for me. You’re like a grenade that could go off at any time.”

Kara said, her voice catching, “Lena, I wish this had never happened. And that I could fix this. And I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok, Kara. It can’t be helped.” Lena sounded resigned.

Kara offered the only thing she could think of. “Do you want me to stop covering L-Corp? At least then you don’t have to see me.”

Lena thought about it, and then said, “No, Kara, please don’t jeopardize your career over this. I can handle seeing you at an event or two. But I… I just need… I don’t know what I need.” Lena sighed and slid off her chair. 

It was a dismissal.

Kara took a breath as she stood up. “Ok. If you think of something, will you let me know? I’ll do anything.”

“I will, Kara.” 

Lena walked Kara to the elevator. When it arrived, she kissed her on the cheek. “Bye, Kara. See you around.” 

Lena still smelled like citrus, and it was overwhelming to be so close. Kara wanted to comfort her, somehow - to wrap her arms around her and tell her everything would be alright. But instead she stepped back and got in the elevator.

Lena leaned against the wall, watching Kara go. She looked drained.

Kara waved awkwardly. “Bye, Lena. Take care.”

The doors closed and Kara rode the elevator down in silence. She managed to hold back her tears until she was outside the building. Then she flew out over the ocean, heartbroken and alone.


	14. Chapter 14

Kara didn’t sleep more than a handful of hours a night for the next few nights. At work, she felt like she was in a fog, reacting to everything around her, but not really being present. And as Supergirl, she fought a few hostile aliens and saved a plane that had lost an engine, but didn’t have the energy to do much more.

Snapper called her into his office on Wednesday and told her she looked ragged, and that he was ordering her to take the rest of the week off. She was grateful, and decided to head to Midvale for a long weekend.

It was good to be back. The air was piney and fresh, and as soon as she opened the front door and dropped her bags, Eliza greeted her with an apple pie (she had baked six in anticipation of Kara’s visit). Eliza also intuitively seemed to know that Kara needed some time to just be, so outside of meals, she left her alone. Kara spent her days going for walks, reading outside in the sunshine, and painting. Painting, as always, was therapeutic. She found herself exploring dark themes: black canvases with splotches of red, seascapes with lightning storms, Krypton just before it exploded. 

After dinner on Saturday night, Kara curled up in her favorite wicker chair on the back porch to look at the stars. And she finally felt ready to come to terms with everything that had happened.

Lena’s words were seared into her brain: _helpless, afraid, utterly terrifying_. The thing Lena craved the most - safety - was exactly what Kara had taken from her. She felt a profound need to right this, if she could.

 _You’re like a grenade that could go off at any time._

Lena was right. The reality was, as long as red kryptonite was out there, Kara wasn’t fully in control of her powers. If someone wanted to turn Supergirl into a weapon, any disaster or emergency where she might be expected to show up could be a trap. And while there was an antidote, it wasn’t a guarantee that she wouldn’t hurt people; it had been too late for Lena. Kara couldn’t expect the DEO to follow her around with an energy gun ‘just in case.’

The only way she could ensure that she wouldn’t be exposed - the only way she could guarantee to Lena that she wouldn’t hurt her again - was to stop being Supergirl. At least until Alex and her team could get a better handle on where the red kryptonite had come from and determine if it was another one-off, or could figure out the suit. 

Kara would miss the rush of saving people in life-and-death situations. And it would be difficult to stand by when people needed help. But there were too many unknowns about red kryptonite, and if she were baited into another rampage, Kara knew she would be responsible. It was a hard decision, but it was the right thing to do.

The silver lining in all of this, though - and Kara was determined to find one - was that she could learn from how she had handled things with Lena. 

Their relationship hadn’t been able to take a natural course, what with Kara pushing down her desires to keep things professional, and then the near-death experience that had blown everything wide open. In retrospect, her attraction and infatuation had seemed like much more: like love. And that had made the stakes seem so much higher than they needed to be. She wondered, had she been more honest with herself and acted on her feelings for Lena, would the red kryptonite have had the same effect on her?

Kara also realized how much she had feared being vulnerable. She hadn’t trusted Lena, faulting her for being too pragmatic and potentially ruthless. She now saw how ridiculous she had been. Because Lena had found out her secret in the worst way possible and could have been vindictive and exposed her identity. Yet instead, she had forgiven her. 

Kara resolved that, if she ever had the opportunity again, she would give Lena the benefit of the doubt. Even if she were afraid. 

And what to do now? Lena hadn’t explicitly asked for space, but Kara reflected on how private she was, and how self-protective she must be feeling. Kara didn’t want to push too hard and cause her to put her guard up even more. A big romantic gesture would no doubt backfire. She also didn’t want to try to gloss over everything, so suggesting something casual like getting coffee or brunch was out. Making small talk would be painful; the awkwardness would likely turn both of them off. And texting Lena also didn’t feel right; at this point, they would probably have a couple superficial conversations that would peter out into nothing.

Kara decided she would write a note to let Lena know that she was stepping back; it was the one thing she had to say that might be meaningful. And then Lena could make the next move when she was ready. Perhaps Lena would see enough good in her to salvage something of their relationship, instead of walking away entirely.

Eliza came out on the porch carrying an apple pie, a plate, some silverware, and a thermos of coffee. She sat down and served herself a small piece, then handed the rest of the pie and a fork to Kara.

“How are you, Kara? You’ve been quiet since you came home.”

Kara took stock and discovered that she felt lighter. There was a lot out of her control, but she knew what she needed to do, and she no longer felt stuck. She shoveled a big bite of pie into her mouth.

“I’m ok, Eliza,” she said with her mouth full. “Things are going to be ok.”

_____

When Kara got back to National City, she headed to the DEO. Alex and J’onn were supportive of her decision, but said it was a loss to the team. They would redouble their efforts to track down who was responsible for the bombs, as well as develop the anti-radiation suit. 

Kara also let Kal-El know about her second exposure to red kryptonite, and that she was going to stop being Supergirl. They had their first major disagreement: he said she was being too cautious. All the good she could do, he said, outweighed the risk of being exposed, especially as both times, nobody had died. Kara could see his point, but on the other hand, he hadn’t intimately violated someone he cared about. She had to do what she thought was right.

______

Kara wrote a note for Lena and dropped it off with the concierge at her building. She was a little cryptic in case Lena had staff to read through her mail.

_“Dear Lena,_

_I hope you are doing ok. Once again, I am sorry for everything._

_I wanted to let you know that I am quitting my other job for now, so what happened before won’t happen again. I hope this might give you some peace of mind, and that you can feel safe._

_If you ever want to talk, I’ll be here._

_Yours,_

_Kara”_

Kara waited hopefully for a response, but none came.

______

It took the media a couple weeks to catch on. Another fire in the valley had burned nearly five thousand acres over a few days, and Supergirl’s absence was conspicuous. There was wall-to-wall coverage as people speculated about her whereabouts. Some reports claimed she had been killed, others that she had been kidnapped or (predictably) that she was pregnant. 

To Kara, it was a bit like attending her own funeral: she got to see what people really thought about her. Most of the sentiment had been positive. CatCo ran an entire section on her most heroic moments, as well as one cringe-worthy article about all the mistakes she had made when she was starting out. People seemed to want her to return, which was touching to see, but also painful because she knew it might be a long time before she could come back, if at all. 

Kara still felt a pang when she heard a cry for help, but she focused on being the best journalist she could be. She was seeing the impact she could have with her words, and it was starting to be enough. 

______

In the weeks that followed, there was radio silence from Lena. Kara began to consider the very real possibility that she might never reach out. 

Kara was sad, but she also accepted the situation. With a bit of distance, she could see that while they had chemistry in spades, their lives were completely different. Perhaps they had intersected for a brief, intense moment - like a comet passing near the earth - never to be in sync again. 

Each time Kara saw Lena at a conference or giving a speech, it got easier. Her emotions felt like a gentle surf sweeping onto a beach, not the crashing breakers of just a month ago. 

She hoped Lena was also getting on.

______

Another month passed. Life had settled into a new normal. There were sisters’ movie nights and game nights, as well as the occasional disastrous date. 

The media had turned its attention to other topics as no new information had emerged about her disappearance. But a highway overpass had collapsed, crime was ticking up, and it had been the worst year for fires in recent memory. Supergirl had been a symbol of hope, and people felt abandoned. It was hard for Kara to watch. What was her duty to National City? Was Kal-El right? But Kara knew she was capable of great violence, and she refused to have blood on her hands. _First, do no harm._

Her work was her salvation. She had gotten a tip about wage inequality and discrimination at Maxwell Lord’s labs, so had started researching a new story all over again. It became all-consuming and kept her from getting depressed.

One Tuesday, through her sources, Kara learned that the FDA was likely to issue a decision in the next week to allow the L-Corp trial to continue. So she set aside her current story and wrote up a draft article, likely the final one for this series. She called L-Corp’s public relations team to ask for a quote, and they said they would email one to her. 

She was in the middle of lunch when she got a call from one of the directors.

“Hey Kara.”

“Hi Liz!” she said brightly. “Got that quote for me?” 

Liz laughed. “Yes, I do. However, I also wanted to offer an interview with our CEO, if CatCo would be willing to cover our point of view in-depth and if you can come this afternoon. We’ve been fairly quiet while the FDA has been deliberating, but we think we have a valuable perspective to share with your readers.”

Kara put down her burger. 

“Uh, yes... That would be great. I need to check with my boss, but pretty sure this will be ok.”

“Excellent. We can do three o’clock. Does that work for you? And I’d get here early, security is pretty tight these days.”

“Yes that works. See you then.”

Kara texted Snapper, who agreed this was a good angle. So she put together a list of questions and mentally prepared herself to meet Lena for the first time in months. She mulled over whether she should be formal, but decided she should just be herself, in hopes that she could put Lena at ease.

______

Kara threw a jacket on top of her belted dress and arrived thirty minutes early. Liz, a thirty-something blonde, met her in the lobby and took her up to the boardroom next to Lena’s office. The door was closed, and when Liz knocked, a man in a suit opened it and said they needed five more minutes. 

Kara talked with Liz about local restaurants while they waited. And she overheard Jess, at her desk, speaking sharply to somebody on the phone. Kara felt sorry for whoever was on the other end of the line. 

The door opened and ten people filed out, then Kara and Liz entered the room. Lena was sitting at the head of the table, her expression serious as she typed something on her laptop. She was wearing a tight-fitting dark floral print dress with a scoop neck, her hair up in a twist. 

For Kara, it was like seeing her again for the first time.

_God, she’s gorgeous._

Kara had thought she was over Lena, but now that she was five feet away, she was suddenly a bundle of nerves. 

Lena looked up. Her eyes softened when she saw Kara, and she closed her computer and stood up.

“Kara. Thank you for coming.” Lena politely held out her hand. “It’s been a long time.”

Kara steeled herself and said amiably, “It has, Lena. Thank you for meeting me.”

They shook hands - Lena’s was impossibly soft - and sat down, Kara in the seat to Lena’s left. Liz walked around the table and sat across from her.

Kara took out her recorder and notebook, and dug around in her bag for a pen.

“So,” Lena said, “Liz here convinced me it was time to draw a line under this trial and that we should do an interview. But I told her you’d be tough on us and we’d probably regret it.”

Kara looked up. Lena was smiling at her.

_Is she teasing me? Or just making conversation?_

“Oh? So why am I here then?” Kara asked, smiling back.

“Well,” Lena winked and said smugly, “I’ve never been one to back down from a challenge.”

_Definitely teasing._

Kara wanted to say something to wipe the self-satisfied look off Lena’s face but decided to let it go; she had an interview to nail. She found her pen and opened her notebook. 

“I see. So, Ms. Luthor, I mean, Lena… the expected decision is unprecedented. Some might say the FDA bowed to public opinion and lobbying instead of following their policies and the rule of law. How do you think this will impact how clinical trial approvals are granted in the future?”

Lena looked amused and turned to Liz. “I told you she wouldn’t ask any softballs!” Then she leaned back in her chair and said, confidently, “Ok, Kara, I believe the FDA made a humane decision, and one that was in the best interests of people who suffer from Huntington’s, but clearly, it was an exception...”

The interview ran for nearly the full hour. In the middle of Kara’s last question, there was a brisk rapping at the door. Jess poked her head in.

“Ms. Luthor. Your next meeting is in your office in five minutes. Hello, Kara Danvers.” She shut the door.

Lena said to Liz, “Liz, thanks again for organizing this. Nice job. Can you please give Kara and me a few minutes?”

“Of course, Ms. Luthor. Kara, I’ll meet you by the elevators when you’re ready to go,” Liz said as she left the room.

Lena pointed to the small black domes in the ceiling that housed the security cameras and motioned to Kara to come with her to the window. As they looked out over the view, their backs to the cameras, Lena turned to Kara and said quietly, “Kara, I was curious, what happened to Supergirl? Are you ok?”

Kara was puzzled. “I sent you a note!”

There was a flicker of recognition in Lena’s eyes. “I… I remember. Right after we last saw each other? I... didn’t read it.”

Kara was a little surprised but took it in stride.

“It’s ok, you had a lot going on,” she said smoothly. “I decided to stop, Lena. I didn’t want to risk being exposed to red kryptonite again. So I wouldn’t hurt you or anybody else.”

Lena looked at her in consternation. “Kara, twenty people died in that last brush fire. This city needs you.”

“Believe me, it’s torture to sit on my hands when I hear the cries,” Kara said, darkly. “But this city managed before I became Supergirl, and I… I just can’t take the risk. I could force myself on you again or kill someone, and I would never forgive myself.”

Lena’s eyes filled with empathy. “Kara…”

There was another knock at the door. Jess said firmly, “Ms. Luthor. You are going to be late.”

Lena exhaled slowly. “Sorry, Kara. I need to go. Can we talk about this later?”

“Sure. Thanks for the interview, Lena.”

They walked to the door and Jess hustled Lena away. 

Kara headed back to CatCo to write. She felt good. It had been a great interview, and she had survived seeing Lena in person, although she realized she definitely wasn’t over her. And Lena had seemed remarkably friendly after such a long silence. 

A small part of her started to hope for a thaw.

_____

A few days later, in the middle of Friday game night, Kara got a text.

[Lena Luthor, 7:58pm] _Kara, can we meet? Somewhere we can talk privately?_

[Kara Danvers, 7:59pm] _Of course. Let me know when and where_

[Lena Luthor, 8:01pm] _Tomorrow? 5pm? How about the botanical gardens?_

[Kara Danvers, 8:01pm] _Sounds good. I haven’t been there in ages_

[Lena Luthor, 8:02pm] _Meet at the conservatory entrance then. Look forward to it_

[Kara Danvers, 8:02pm] _Me too_

Kara smiled to herself. Things were looking up.


	15. Chapter 15

The National City Botanical Gardens had a Beaux-Arts-style conservatory with an ornate wrought iron and glass roof, and acres of landscaped gardens in different styles - French, English, Japanese - a couple miles from the city center.

Kara was early and waited on the conservatory steps in a light jacket, striped shirt, and dark jeans. She had spent the entire day wondering what Lena wanted to talk about. 

The silver Rolls Royce came up the drive at five minutes to five, and Frank hurried out to open the door for Lena. He tipped his hat when he saw Kara, and she waved at him.

Lena got out and swept up the stairs. She was wearing a plum trench coat, black slacks, and trendy sneakers. Her hair was up in a sleek ponytail, and Kara was drawn again to the exquisite line of her jaw. She felt her nerves start up again.

“Hey Lena. It’s good to see you,” Kara said lightly, even though her heart had started pounding in her chest.

“Hi Kara. You too.” Lena smiled at her and - much to Kara’s surprise - stepped in close to kiss her cheek. She took out her wallet and pushed a hundred dollar bill into the voluntary collection box in the lobby. Then they cut through the building to the gardens on the other side.

Lena led Kara down a path to a large lawn that was neatly mowed to look like a chessboard, and bordered by densely planted flower beds and hedges. It was serene and practically deserted. The air was crisp and the flowers were in full bloom, color everywhere. Kara relaxed as they walked, hearing the crunch of the gravel beneath their feet, the birds calling in the trees. They found a bench on the far side of the garden with a view of downtown.

“This is one of my favorite spots in the whole city,” Lena declared as she turned towards Kara. “Being half-Irish, I’m not exactly fond of the English, but I can admit they know something about gardening.”

“It’s so beautiful, and still sort of wild,” Kara agreed as she sprawled out on the bench. “Anyway… how are you doing, Lena?” 

“Oh, I’m doing ok. Although,” Lena said slyly, “I just did an interview with a hotshot reporter who raked me and L-Corp over the coals about exerting undue influence on regulators.”

Kara chuckled. “Hotshot, eh? She sounds annoying.” 

“Yes, she’s been a thorn in my side ever since we met,” Lena’s eyes twinkled. “And how are you, Kara?”

“I’m fine! Work is busy and going well, other than interviews with know-it-all CEOs.” Bantering with Lena was as easy as it had ever been. “Other than that, it’s been pretty quiet.”

“About that…” Lena said carefully, ”I wanted to talk to you about what you said the other day. Kara, you have got to get back out there.”

Kara didn’t want to have this debate now. “I can’t, Lena. I’ve told you why,” she said, a little irritably. 

Lena tilted her head. “Maybe I could help?” 

“How?” Kara was skeptical. 

“So,” Lena stared at her feet, “I… have something to tell you, Kara. I’m not sure you’re going to like it. Actually, I’m pretty sure you won’t. But,” she looked at Kara directly, “I hope you will reserve judgment.”

“Oh?” Kara said, intrigued.

“I have... kryptonite,” Lena said. “Red and green. Well, the red I’m not sure about yet, but what we could do is....” 

Kara couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“You _what_? Where did you get it?” 

Lena’s eyes widened at the outburst. She said calmly, “I know this must be surprising for you, but please let me explain... Back when I took over LuthorCorp, I found Lex’s secret lab and took an inventory before I had it walled off. Among other things, he had a vault filled with kryptonite. The green kind.”

Kara crossed her arms. Of course Lex had been stockpiling kryptonite, and she hated him for it. 

“And what are _you_ doing with it?” Kara couldn’t keep the suspicion out of her voice.

“Kara, please hear me out,” Lena said evenly. She paused and took a breath. “Look, after we last talked, I was... a mess. You were all I could think about, and it was very... disruptive. I would be in a meeting and start obsessing that you might burst through the window, and I would have to call a break until I calmed down. Or I would wake up in the middle of the night and imagine you holding me down and… Anyway, I wasn’t sleeping, and I was drinking too much. And it was starting to impact my work.”

She traced a pattern in the gravel with her foot.

“I went to Paris for a week to get away and figure out what to do. I couldn’t live like this, in fear. And I realized my only option was the kryptonite, since the government wouldn’t give me the antidote. So when I got back, I reopened the lab and took some to keep with me, just in case. It became like... a safety blanket. Kara, it helped me to heal, knowing that you weren’t invincible. That I wasn’t powerless. That I could... hurt you too.”

Kara bit her tongue to keep from saying anything she’d regret. Lena had no idea what she was dealing with. Being exposed to kryptonite felt like being set on fire from the inside. This was hardly a proportional response.

She glared at Lena. “You know it doesn’t just hurt me, right? That I could die an incredibly painful death?” 

Lena met her eyes and said quietly, “Yes, I know, Kara. I know what it can do to you. And I didn’t take this step lightly. But… it was the only way I could defend myself, and I hope you can understand that.”

Kara didn’t say anything and looked away.

Lena sighed. “This is exactly why I thought I couldn’t see you again, Kara. I knew from Lex how Superman felt about kryptonite and assumed you felt the same… and it appears you do. I would have had to hide this from you, so what was the point of trying to rekindle anything? Which is why, when I saw your letter, I... threw it away…” She added, hollowly, “...and maybe it was a mistake to tell you even now.”

Kara tried to get ahold of her swirling emotions. She felt angry and afraid. When she had forced herself on Lena, it had been out of her control, and she was making an incredible sacrifice to keep it from ever happening again. Whereas Lena had consciously chosen to carry around a potentially lethal substance, knowing the harm it could cause. 

But as angry as Kara was, she still felt a certain tenderness towards Lena. 

She glanced over. Lena was playing with her hands, and seemed so disappointed that Kara’s heart sank. 

Lena glanced at her. “Maybe we should go,” she said gently.

_No! Don’t go..._

Panic sharpened Kara’s mind. If Lena walked away now, Kara knew it would be the end of their relationship. 

She took a deep breath. She had promised herself that she would give Lena the benefit of the doubt, as difficult as that was to do where kryptonite was concerned. And it shouldn't have been that surprising that Lena would take matters into her own hands and do whatever it took to feel secure. 

Kara put a hand on Lena’s arm to keep her from getting up, saying humbly, “No, please stay, Lena. Thank you for telling me.” 

Lena looked cautiously at Kara, as though she didn’t quite believe her abrupt change of tone.

Kara exhaled and said, “I’m going to be honest, I’m not thrilled you have it, and I wish you would destroy it. But... I get how afraid you were, and why you would go to such lengths. And I’m still sorry I put you in this situation… I know you didn’t ask for any of this.”

Lena nodded and gave Kara a small smile. “Thanks, Kara. I appreciate that you can see my point of view. And please believe I hoped I would never have to use it.”

“I believe you,” Kara said sincerely. She rested her arm along the back of the bench and turned so she faced Lena. She felt ready to listen now. “Anyway, what were you saying? Why did you bring this up now?”

The corner of Lena’s mouth quirked up, as though she couldn’t believe Kara was this dense. “I told you already, Kara! It probably seems out of the blue, but I really do want to help you.” She bit her lip. “I had tried to avoid all the news about Supergirl so I could get on with my life, but the disasters in the past few weeks reminded me of all the good you’ve done too, and... how you took care of me when Lex bombed my place. And I started to wonder why you’d stopped and how you were doing. And then Liz happened to be pushing for an interview…” 

Her voice grew soft. “And when I saw you the other day, Kara, I realized that I still... cared for you. And then when you said you’d stopped being Supergirl so you wouldn’t hurt me… Kara, I’ve been solving the wrong problem. I was so fixated on trying to protect myself, I hadn’t even considered how I might protect you from red kryptonite. But I’m here now, and I have some ideas...” 

She looked at Kara, trying to gauge her reaction.

Still recovering from the bombshell that Lena had kryptonite, Kara felt a few steps behind.

_Wait… she still cares for me?_

_And she might be able to help me with red kryptonite?_

The anxiety that was coiling in Kara’s stomach started to unwind. She asked, this time curious and open, “Like what?”

Lena sat up, emboldened. “Well, for the past few nights, I’ve been running some experiments to understand kryptonite’s molecular structure and properties, and how we might change its absorption and transmission windows for visible light. And yesterday I synthesized a version with a different lattice that transmitted strongly at a 650 nanometer wavelength, so it appears red, but I don’t know if it’s the same as what you were exposed to. But, if you could give me a tissue sample, we could see what it does to your cells...” 

Kara was half-listening, deep in thought. She had always judged anybody who had kryptonite to be a danger to her existence; there was no room for nuance. But maybe Lena having kryptonite, at least for research, was not such a terrible thing after all. 

“...because, I have a hypothesis that the radiation causes mutations that impact how your cells synthesize proteins. And that the impacted proteins move through your vasculature - because they are visible in your eyes - and act on your amygdala, given the personality change we observed. I am assuming your biology is similar to a human’s, but that’s another question I have for you. In any case, we might have to do a controlled dosing study to see any effects _in vivo_ , if you’d be comfortable with that. And then, the most practical thing in the near term might be to build you a radiation detector, so you can at least be alerted to the presence of red kryptonite before you get too close - provided that it has a unique enough isotopic signature - but longer term, maybe we could find something to bind to the protein so it becomes too big to cross the blood-brain barrier, and also causes an immunogenic response...” 

Lena caught herself. “Sorry, Kara. I’m fascinated by all this, and I’m getting ahead of myself. What do you think?”

Kara shook her head to clear it. She had become transfixed by how elegantly Lena moved her hands through the air to explain her thoughts, how her bright green eyes danced with excitement.

However, the significance of what Lena was proposing - to make her immune to the effects of red kryptonite - was starting to sink in. Deep down, Kara hadn’t believed that an underfunded DEO lab would come through for her, but now a genius with nearly unlimited resources was offering to help her. Kara felt hopeful for the first time in months. 

But what came out was, 

“You are _such_ a nerd, Lena Luthor!” 

Lena rolled her eyes and smacked Kara’s arm indignantly. “Hey! Do you want my help or not, Kara… Zor-El?” 

It was unexpectedly wonderful to hear Lena use her real name. Kara said genuinely, “Of course I do. Thank you very much for offering. If anybody can think up a way out of this, it’s you, Lena.”

Lena seemed pleased. “Good. I’m excited to work on this with you.”

“Me too.”

It felt like they should seal the deal somehow. Should they hug? Or shake hands? Or maybe Lena should take the lead? Kara was gun shy of initiating anything physical with her. As she was debating, the moment passed. Lena looked down, and they lapsed into silence. 

Kara turned to take in the garden. It was a beautiful day. The air was fragrant with lavender and roses, and the late afternoon sun bathed the flowers in a golden light. A pair of birds fluttered around in the hedge behind them. 

But as the minutes ticked by, the silence grew more uncomfortable. Lena started playing with her hands again. And Kara had so many thoughts running through her head, it was hard to parse them to find anything to start a conversation with.

Finally, she said simply, “Lena, I’m glad we’re talking again.”

Lena looked up and said wryly. “Are we talking? You seem pretty quiet.”

Kara laughed. “Oh no, don’t you put this on me! You’re the one who wanted to meet!” 

“And you didn’t?” Lena teased. Then she said, subdued, “Truthfully… I feel a little awkward, Kara. So much has happened in the last few months… I don’t know where we stand or how to act with you. On one hand, it’s been so intense, it’s like we’ve been through a war. But on the other, we’ve barely spent any time together… except, of course,” she smirked, “that weekend when I absolutely _crushed_ you at chess.” 

Kara had to grin. “No, I let you win, remember?”

Lena arched an eyebrow. “We should have a rematch, then.”

Kara saw the affection in Lena’s eyes, and suddenly the world seemed brighter, full of possibility. 

She took a deep breath. “Lena, what if we did have a rematch? Between us, I mean. Set up the board again and see where things go, like you once suggested?”

Lena studied Kara for a few moments. Finally, she smiled hesitantly and said, “I was thinking that would be nice… but is that what you really want, Kara? You always seemed to be pushing me away before.”

Kara knew she had a history to overcome. She made a face. “I know I did, Lena, and I was an idiot. I… I had my reasons, but they seem trivial now, and I was wrong not to trust you.” 

Her words tumbled out nervously as she fidgeted with her glasses. “Lena, I’ve... never met anybody like you before. And I think the world of you. I haven’t once told you how brilliant you are, or how much I admire your honesty, and your resilience... and that you are so stunning I can barely string a sentence together when I look at you...”

Lena‘s smile had been growing wider as she listened, and she touched a finger to Kara’s lips. “Hush, Kara. I think I’ve heard enough...” Then she slowly leaned in and murmured against her mouth, “But please don’t put me on a pedestal… how about we just take it a day at a time and actually get to know each other?” 

The nearness of Lena was dizzying. Kara cradled Lena’s face with her hands and brought their lips together as she breathed in the familiar citrus notes of Lena’s perfume. Lena sighed and pressed in, as though she couldn’t get close enough to Kara. 

They kissed hungrily, passionately. It felt real and true, no secrets between them anymore. The heartache and tension of the past months dissolved into nothing as they became like one.

Then Kara’s stomach growled and she pulled back.

“What’s wrong?” Lena breathed, still chasing Kara’s lips.

Kara blushed and said apologetically, “Uh... I’m sorry… Lena, I would love to continue this, but I’m _starving._ You should know I need about three times the calories of a human, sometimes more."

Lena sat back on the bench and took a deep breath to compose herself. She looked at Kara with a mix of amusement and disbelief. “You poor thing. You must be hungry all the time! How do you get anything done?”

“I sneak extra meals constantly,” Kara admitted. It felt great to not have to hide her appetite. “Uh, would you like to have dinner with me tonight? Like... right now?”

Lena grinned. “Sure. I could go for a salad.”

Kara shot her a withering look.

Lena stifled a giggle. “Potstickers, then?”

“Obviously,” Kara grumbled. “How could our first date not have potstickers?”

“Yes, I can’t think of anything more romantic than watching you talk with your mouth full, chipmunk.”

“I am _not_ a chipmunk!”

Lena laughed as she pulled out her phone to text Frank to come get them. As they waited for him, Kara put her arm around Lena, who rested her head on Kara’s shoulder, and they sat quietly, looking out over the manicured lawn to the skyscrapers beyond. 

Kara knew she would have to square things with Snapper on Monday. And learn how to navigate the glare of the media as she and Lena became a story. And someday, when she could return to being Supergirl, they would need to figure out how to keep her identity under wraps. But those were problems for another day. 

Right now, it felt like everything had fallen into place, thanks to red kryptonite of all things. She would never have otherwise taken the risk to tell Lena the truth about herself, but now Lena accepted who she was. Kara didn’t have to lie anymore. She had the freedom to fall in love without holding anything back, and - hopefully, someday - be loved in return.

Lena nudged her, interrupting her thoughts. “Hey, Frank is here… shall we?”

Kara pulled Lena in for another kiss, then grabbed her hand. They strolled back through the idyllic garden, on their first date and into their future, together.


End file.
